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Apekjolly

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  1. HOW TO OVERCOME ANGER Anger is a tool used by an animal to defend itself against a threat. When an animal is attacked, for instance, it gets angry and uses the ferocity to fight back. A human being, according to scientists, is still basically an animal. That's why when we're confronted with a something which we perceive as an assault against us, we also fight back in anger. Our anger is a spontaneous reaction which is actually no more useful to us humans living in a human society. It has even become our enemy because a bad temper can jeopardize our own standing. And to know how to defeat the enemy, we need to know its origin and waht it's made of. Likewise, we need know our anger in order to know how to handle it. The life we face today is a very different kind from the one we faced in our primitive past. Many things which make us angry today are no more life-threatening in nature. But then we nevertheless still react to the threats like they are a danger to our lives. This is simply because there is that animal instinct which is still inside us. So, if every time we get angry and if we can see ourselves as behaving like animals, that kind of realization could help us control ourselves. We can visualize our anger as a kind of monster which is living inside us; and that monster is always ready to make us look like a monster. We can thus use our mental intellectuality to curb the monster from rearing its ugly head. Another way to handle anger is to ask ourselves these questions before we blow our top: “What is so great about displaying my temper? Even a dog has a temper, so do I want to show myself no better than a dog?” Of course there are times when suppression of anger is seemingly not possible at all. This happens when we perceive someone as being extremely unfair or invasive towards us. But before we let sparks fly all over the place, we can always try to evaluate whether or not the situation has reached the point of being either a threat to our life or a threat to our well-being; otherwise it may be just a waste of our time and energy for us to cook up a fury. We should always subdue our wrath and only let it have its heyday when it is time for it to do its rightful work like fighting off a robber or chasing after a snatch thief. Lastly, let us realize that when we' are angry, we are the one who is inflicted with the agony of anger while the person whom we're angry at might be relishing his or her success in making us angry. So, why should we want to allow ourselves to be the loser of the deal? Sometimes, we can even get the better side of the deal by keeping our cool because, by doing so, we would, instead, cause the other person to simmer with rage to see that his or her taunting us has produced no effect. That's how to reverse the situation to our advantage. And that's also how we can maintain our composer most of the times. Oh ya, one more point for you to ponder upon: If someone calls you a monkey, and if you don't actually look like one, you simply don't have to give a hoot about the remark. After all, everyone else can see that you don't look like a monkey. Instead, they would think that the person who calls you as such is the real monkey. So keep cool everyone and be happy.
  2. I have a tattoo on my left arm which has been a source of embarrassment to me rather than a pride. Well, it was all my fault, actually. What happened was, during that time, many years ago, there wasn't any tattoo shop in Sarawak here. So, I got an elderly man from a native tribe to do one for me. Before we started work, I brought him to a coffee shop to have some beer. After the second bottle, we found ourselves in a superb mood to go for the third, then the fourth, and then we lost count. Eventually we wobbled home cheerful and chatty and started work, with me lying on the floor of the guest room in my quarters Thanks to the beer; the pain I felt was not anymore ticklish than mosquito bites as his 6-needled tattooing tool pecked at my skin. What transpired next, I have no idea; but when I found myself awake again, I saw my craftsman also lying on the floor snoring away like a pig. I checked the work he had done and ... OH SHIT! What a mess!. It was half completed and it didn't even have the slightest semblance to my original design. When we both had recovered from the hangover, we worked at the unfinished masterpiece again and modified it to a shape which looked more or less like, well, an anchor? Maybe more like an alien's spaceship or something more romantic than that, I don't know. All said, I bet you'd all agree with me that I should NOT have brought him to the coffee shop BEFORE the tattoo work. I should have "put the horse before the cart", and not the other way round. By the way, as for you ladies out there who might be thinking of having a tattoo, this is my comment: To me, it kind of looks cool if a lady has a pretty little tattoo at a spot that's not too conspicuous. If I were a woman, I think I'd have one done somewhere at my breast, and I'm not joking or trying to be horny when I say so, okay?
  3. This thread reminds me of why people like to watch movies or read story books. It also explains why people love gossips. You see. we all know what CM and lover do are wrong, and yet we all seem to be very interested to want to know the development of their affair. What more to say we know his story could be a real life true story. Anyway, let's all look at the positive side of things and let's thank him for having shared with us his romantic tale. It helps to make this forum more spicey and hot.
  4. meiteoh, Sometime ago, you brought up a thought-provoking subject on the unequal distribution of wealth around the world. Kind of, too little people have too many and too many have too little. As you said, about 90% of the world's wealth is in the hands of only10% of the world's population. Nobody can argue with you on that. I believe you must be wondering if something is wrong somewhere. Could it be due to how things are organized in this world? I suspect one of the areas from which the scourge originates is the economic system. You see, our economic system does overwhelmingly favor those who have money, but is viciously hostile towards those who don't have money. Economics is, however, too complicated for most people (including myself) to understand. It is the very sophisticated and mysterious nature of the economics mechanism which helps it to camouflage its ruthlessness. But I believe, at the bottom all that complexity, is a very simple truth. Economics has evolved into a tool used by the 10% advantaged group to exploit and enslave the 90% group. Its mechanism is quite clear: Money is used to make money. But if you don't already have money, you have to use a lot of your energy to make a little money. And you'll never seem to make enough extra money for yourself to use as a tool to make more money. Reason? Normally, based on the time and energy you put into your work, you ought to be making quite a great deal more money than you actually need. But then, any extra which you have made is being surreptitiously siphoned off by the 10% group through the economic system. From another angle, the concept looks like this: The majority of the working people in the world are actually made to earn just enough money to be able keep themselves alive so that they can go on working to make the rich people richer. Let's look at another scenario: In the law of nature, every living creature has to hunt for its own food if it wants to be alive. This basically means that everyone has to work to earn a living and not depend on others like a parasite. But when it comes to human society, that natural law breaks down: It is possible for a person to not having to lift a finger to do any work at all and yet he can live luxuriously all his life. Worse still, he can even do things which waste resources which otherwise are extremely valuable to others. How can such a scenario exist? Where do all the things that the person squanders and consumes come from? Why do those things want to automatically go to him without he having to chase after them? The answer lies in none other than what we call “money”. It's all because somehow he already has a sum of money, and that money is the thing he can use as a tool of manipulation to make others work for him. And that is possible only because of how our economic system is designed.
  5. When a child sees a new toy, he would toss aside his old toy and grab the new one to play with. He would be excited about the new toy even if it is no better than his old one. The same thing could have happened to chickmagnet when he found his new lover. Right now, of course he is blissfully “in love” with her because she is a “new toy” to him while his lover also treats him likewise. Oh, how romantic! I'm so jealous! But although I'm jealous, I still manage to weave a poem to be dedicated to them. Here it goes: HONESTLY SPEAKING, AHEAD OF THEM, I CAN SEE LIGHTNING FLASHING AND HEAR THUNDER RUMBLES. HOW LONG CAN THE LOVERS HOLD UP THEIR RAINBOW-COLORED AIR CASTLE BEFORE IT TUMBLES AND CRUMBLES? MY SINCERE ADVICE TO THEM IS THAT THEY SHOULD QUICKLY WAKE UP FROM THEIR DEEP DRUNKEN SLUMBER AND BE SOBER. OR ELSE, THEY WILL FIND OUT TOO LATE THAT PLAYING WITH MALE-FEMALE SEXUAL CHEMISTRY IS AS LETHAL AS PLAYING WITH FIRE Well, I don't know if the lovers have been watching too many romantic movies or reading to many romance novels, but I just hope they don't forget that their affair is down-to-earth and real, and what they do can shame and hurt real flesh and blood people.
  6. "But then again what would happen if we meet an aggressor? Would we not have the capability to defend ourselves as we are incapable of fighting back or killling others even if they are killing us?" daddyo, You've brought up a very important point (above) which I've never thought of before. It makes me begin to wonder if that is the reason why humankind needs to have an evil element in their hearts. Put simply, perhaps we have to be bad inorder to be able to defend ourselves against a possible aggressor. But then that seems to be indeed a very high price to pay. Which is to say we need to cause suffering to ourselves in order to go on living. What an irony. isn't it? That reminds me of an answer a buddhist monk gave to a person who asked him what the meaning of life was. He curtly replied: "Life is suffering". Anyway, daddyo, that issue would be food for thought for me for quite a while to come.
  7. Okay, today let's have some lighter stuff for some fun. Sometimes, we like to daydream and lose ourselves in the world of fantasy. So, let me fantasize on the question which beautifulgown's hubby has asked: DO WE NEED JUSTICE IF EVERYONE IS GOOD? We can answer this question with another question: IF NOBODY DOES ANYTHING BAD, WHO NEEDS TO BE JUDGED FOR A WRONG? Now, from that question, I'd like to venture further and ask: WHAT WOULD LIFE BE LIKE IF EVERYONE IN THE WORLD IS GOOD? If we're all good to one another and there's no crime like killing, fighting, robbing, cheating, stealing, hating, etc etc etc, and if my mind roams free, I'd visualize a world as follows: It's a world of paradise. Heaven is here on earth, and there's no need to wait till we die to go to heaven (if there's really such a place as heaven) First, let me list out the things that we don't need if everyone is good: We don't need soldiers and weapons because there would be no battles and wars to be fought. This is a huge financial saving as military expenditure is the costliest for a country. We don't need police or security guards because there're no bad people to catch, and thus neither prisons nor wardens are needed as well. This again is another huge saving. We don't need lawyers because we don't need to put our dealings in writings to prevent cheating. We don't need courts and judges because we don't quarrel nor commit crimes, and thus we don't need them to handle such cases. We don't need politics because politics is about fighting to protect rights, fighting for wants as well as fighting to control and to dominate one another. We don't need locks and keys, security alarms and security codes, passwords, CCTVs, or any other items, systems, and procedures related to security matters because no one would be dishonest enough to want to intrude into each other's privacy. We don't need to write so many letters and memos in offices because a lot of things can be done without the need to put them in black and white. This would require so much less documents and files to be kept. We don't need so many hospitals, clinics, doctors, and nurses because there would be so much less health related problems to handle as people care about the safety of others in everything they do. We don't need money and banks because we don't need such a system to record the value of things we possess as prevention against cheating. Banking is also a system to exploit money out of one another. If there's no money, then there'd be also no need for accounting works, and therefore no need for any accountants or any other workers related to accounting. We don't need licences, certificates, testimonials etc because we don't need papers to restrict and define individuals to prevent trespassing into one another's boundaries or bluffing one another of one's own worth. . Lastly - believe it or not - we don't need religions! Because the actual original purpose of religions is to make humans good. A question you may now ask is: If there's no need for any soldiers, police, guards, lawyers, judges, accountants, etc etc, where would all these people have been employed? My answer is: Don't worry. There are lots and lots of other things to do in the world - things which can make the world a better place for everyone to live in. For example, instead of spending so much energy and resources on military defense and weapons, we can direct our energy and resources to build more roads, more buildings, more bridges, and more recreational parks and recreational facilities. We can provide better healthcare to make everyone healthy and live longer. We can tidy up, clean, and beautify our villages, towns and cities; plant flowers everywhere and do landscaping in every nook and corner of our surrounding; rear animals, birds, and insects and train them to live among humans. We can direct our energy towards scientific research on anything which benefits humankind including devising ways and means to protect the environment and overcome bad weathers and natural disasters. Well, the possibilities are endless if you keep on thinking about what we can do with all the extra resources that we would have available for use if they have not been squandered away to be used in other countless ways just to combat human evils. By the way, you may wonder how would business be conducted if we don't use money. Answer: there would be no commercial business. But there would be industries and factories making everything we need for living and comfort, and all these products would be put in collection centers for anyone to take free of charge. Of course nobody would take away more than he or she requires because, remember, everyone is good and no one would waste anything. If you need a service at home, just make a phone call and someone will come to do it free for you. If you want to eat outside, just go to a restaurant, order, eat, say “thank you”, and leave. And who pays for all the things and services you use? Answer: You pay for them by contributing your share of time, energy, and skill to others who also get them free from you. In other words, you serve others free and others serve you free. Everyone would be only allowed to work for 3 to 4 hours per day, and the rest of the time is for luxury and fun. If you want to work longer hours, you'd have to ask for it and explain why. “Hah hah! This Apekjolly has gone mad!”, you may exclaim. “How can such a world is possible?” You're right. Such an utopian world is not possible simply because not everyone is good. But if someone can just pluck out the evil element from humankind, can you explain why any one of those scenarios I visualized is not possible?
  8. You people really tempt me with all those cake pictures. Next time if I come in here I will get ready a pail under my chin to catch the drooling saliva.
  9. meiteoh & daddyo, I copy paste this post from my thread because I find it appropiate to be put here after I have come in here. I have read both your latest posts. It's nice to know that there are anti-predjudice people like you around. And it's also nice to read meiteoh's admission that everyone do harbor a certain degree of "racism". Racism is a kind of tribal instinct which, in a sense, is natural, and thus can be said to be unavoidable. It's important to recognise it as such so that we can use human wisdom to fight against a natural instinct which has a detrimental effect if allowed to fluorish in modern cosmopolitan societies. Prejudice against dark skin? Now that we already have a dark skin guy who has become the most powerful person in the world. And he has been put in that position by millions of white-skinned people. This is a very positive indication that the world is changing. Yesterday I found myself clapping in the office to hear the breaking news that Obama won as the President of America. I was jubilant at his victory for a number of reasons: First, I personally like his look. He looks like a nice guy (There isn't a trace of evilness at all in his face). Secondly, his victory would show to the world that the most advanced country in the world has defeated racial prejudice. Third, I want Malaysians to see that it is not necessary that only a person who comes from "the original race" of a country can be the ruler. I want Malaysians to see that a person can be a ruler of a country as long as he is fair and good regardless of his race. I hope the world will become a more peaceful place to live in after Obama. I hope Obama will discard the Bush's confrontational kind of politics and I hope Obama will make those so-called "terrorists" to become his friends. And above all, the most immediate change I hope to see is the speedy recovery of the current global economic crisis.
  10. meiteoh & daddyo, I have read both your latest posts. It's nice to know that there are anti-predjudice people like you around. And it's also nice to read meiteoh's admission that everyone do harbor a certain degree of "racism". Racism is a kind of tribal instinct which, in a sense, is natural, and thus can be said to be unavoidable. It's important to recognise it as such so that we can use human wisdom to fight against a natural instinct which has a detrimental effect if allowed to fluorish in modern cosmopolitan societies. Prejudice against dark skin? Now that we already have a dark skin guy who has become the most powerful person in the world. And he has been put in that position by millions of white-skinned people. This is a very positive indication that the world is changing. Yesterday I found myself clapping in the office to hear the breaking news that Obama won as the President of America. I was jubilant at his victory for a number of reasons: First, I personally like his look. He looks like a nice guy (There isn't a trace of evilness at all in his face). Secondly, his victory would show to the world that the most advanced country in the world has defeated racial prejudice. Third, I want Malaysians to see that it is not necessary that only a person who comes from "the original race" of a country can be the ruler. I want Malaysians to see that a person can be a ruler of a country as long as he is fair and good regardless of his race. I hope the world will become a more peaceful place to live in after Obama. I hope Obama will discard the Bush's confrontational kind of politics and I hope Obama will make those so-called "terrorists" to become his friends. And above all, the most immediate change I hope to see is the speedy recovery of the current global economic crisis.
  11. We must all bear in mind that a man and a woman are not only different in anatomy; they are also different in minds. Neuroscientists have found out that the brain of a male operates differently in some ways from that of a female. Thus, this could explain why men and women think differently. When they think differently, they also look at things differently. So, a matter that is very important to a woman may never cross the mind of a man as of any importance at all. This would naturally give rise to misundersatanding, conflicts, and anger. It does help to a certain extend to have better communication between the two parties so that each knows what is in the mind of the other. Add in a dash of give-and-take attitude from both, then things should improve tremendously. So, happy living together everyone.
  12. beautifulgown, Oouuu ...., what a pity, but finally you got someone to love and marry you, right? Mind to share how it happened? :P
  13. beautifulgown, Your hubby brought up a very interesting question: If everyone is good, do we still need justice? I will come to that subject one of these days. Meanwhile, stay beautiful. Tata!
  14. Some time ago, daddyo mentioned “the playing field being not level”. He's right. We are born into a playing field which is very uneven. So, it's not a fair game for us all. And was it Abraham Lincoln who said “All men are born equal”? Politically he was right because what he actually meant was: “All men should be born equal”. Every citizen of a country should be given equal opportunities to pursue the goodness of life; that is his intended meaning I believe. But the reality? Not all men are born equal. Some people are born poor, some born rich, some born pretty, and some born ugly, some born stupid and some born clever. We come into this world on unequal terms, grow up on unequal grounds and after that expected to make choices based on unequal platforms. Those of us who are on higher grounds can of course reach for the fruits easier. And,by the way, life isn't a buffet party where we can choose what to eat. Many don't even have a buffet party from which to make a choice. If you're born rich, pretty, and strong, everything in life would seem to flow according to your wish. You get all the attention and all the pampering you want. Life is so nice; so romantic; and so exciting. Why worry? Why need to cheat, to steal, to rob? You can even give and be worshipped for your generosity. But if you're born poor, ugly, and weak, everything in life would seem to be against you. You'd be ignored and hated. Life is so bad and so demoralizing, and so you ask, “What have I done to deserve this?” You feel something is not right, like as if you have been robbed of everything. You become frustrated and angry and so you cheat, steal and rob in an attempt to get even, and then, alas, you'd be further cursed and punished for the bad things you do. Is life fair? Life has never been fair all along and everywhere. You can clearly see it with your very own eyes. Just take one very common scenario as an example: I'm sure you've seen pictures of those starving and dying children in Africa. Is it fair for them to be born into such misery? And, oh, please don't answer me with one of those stale axioms that says “God has his own reasons which we don't understand.” It makes me want to drop dead right on the spot to hear such a dumb thing coming from yet another person who doesn't seem to have a brain to think, question, and wonder.
  15. Heh heh. You all may wonder what the heck I'm doing in this thread. Well, I just “kepo” drop in to see what's going on in here. Okay, here's my say on the subject. The right time to have a baby? My answer is: 9 months after the wedding. Why? Because that's the natural timing if every goes on according to convention and you know the reason of course. I can almost hear a chorus of protest of “oooooo! How old fashion this apek is”. Okay, okay. In fact I was joking only. Of course when to have a baby all depends on the individual's circumstances and also depends on how long the couple have been together. How long together? Assuming that the couple's financial, logistical, and marriage situation is all ok and if the couple have known each other less than a year before marriage, then the best time to have a baby is about two years after wedding. This is to allow time for the couple to enjoy a period of romance which is free from the burden of a baby. But if the couple has been enjoying each other's company for years before wedding, then I don't even mind even to see a bride with a pregnant belly on her wedding day. Am I still old-fashioned? Heh heh “Happy beranak everyone”. BUT, one advice I hate to give is: If you feel that something is not right at all with your marriage, DON”T have a baby first until you feel right!
  16. This is what I can say about washing hair during confinement: No doctors in the world ever advised a woman not to wash her hair during confinement. If you ever come across a doctor who says so, that doctor should be asked to close down his or her clinic and "balik kampung tanam jagung."
  17. daddyo, Let me now refer to your response to my “killing the killer punishment” concept. It seems that I had failed to make myself understood. Anyway, let me clarify: If the context of what I wrote is examined as a whole, one should see that the word “killer” which I used was not meant to refer to a person who has merely killed someone. The killer I mean is a person who has demonstrated himself to have the potential to kill someone regardless of whether or not he has really killed someone. Thus, a person who has killed someone need not necessarily be deemed a killer. That's why we have the court of law to arbitrate on the circumstances which lead to the killing. If a person kills to defend himself or to defend someone else from being unlawfully killed, definitely he should not be deemed a killer and thus should not be penalized for the act. The two hypothetical scenarios that you have given were actually not quite pertinent to the essence of my deliberation simply because I was not talking about our justice system being perfect or not perfect. I was talking about human beings which were “out-of-order” and these malfunctioning individuals should not be allowed to roam free and be a constant threat to safety of others. In fact, among the things I was trying to suggest was that we should not be too carried away by what we call “human rights” to the extend that the death penalty was abolished altogether. We need the death penalty simply because of the fact that any human who, in cold blood, takes away the life of another human must also have his life taken away by the law. And how the judges rule a case in the court of law to mete out a capital punishment is a totally different matter. Judges are humans, and humans can make mistakes, be biased, or be corruptible. That is what could make a justice system unjust as what you have pointed out.
  18. daddyo, Just to quickly acknowledge that I have briefly read your last post. But I still don't have the time to study the circumstances of your two scenarios. There's a phrase you used which aroused my interest which I intend to touch on one of these days. That phrase is "if the playing field is level". I'll be back in due course. Meanwhile, happy living everyone. Bye.
  19. I refer to my earlier discussion under the topic "FREEDOM OF CHOICE?" where at the end of it I said I'd answer my own questions as to whether or not a person is accountable for his own actions; or if it is justified to punish a person who has committed a crime. But before that, let me share with you two little stories: When I was small, my mother once caned me for playing in a filthy drain during a heavy downpour. “You are so cruel!”, I wailed while her rattan kept on stinging my buttocks. “No, I am in fact being kind to you,” she replied and gave me a few more sharp lashes. The point of her sarcasm only struck home to me years later. By punishing me like that, my mother had prevented me from catching a cold or even from being swept away and drowned. She had to be cruel in order to be kind. The other story was an incident which also happened when I was small: I, three other little kids, and two big boys who were brothers, were riding in a little boat in a small river. We were having fun paddling it to and fro and laughing at the antics of one of the big boys. The naughty entertainer was the elder brother of the one who was commissioned as the skipper of the boat. At one point, the overloaded boat suddenly tipped and water rushed in. Quickly the skipper pushed the entertainer off the boat and sent him splashing into the river. He swam to the bank and climbed aground all wet and muddy. We, the little kids, who were horrified at the spectacle, scolded the skipper for being cruel to his brother. His reply to us was: “Listen here kids! If I did not push him off, the boat would sink and you all would drown, you know that? Besides, I knew he could swim and, wasn't he the one who tipped the boat with his foolish dancing?” So, that younger brother had held his elder brother accountable for his actions and thus threw him off the boat to save others. Now, my answer to the questions I mentioned at the beginning would therefore be: Yes, we need to make a person accountable for his actions so as to save others from becoming victims. We have to be cruel in order to be kind because in the interest of the majority, the rights of an individual is subdued. That's how the law operates. . Do I contradict myself? In my earlier argument I said our actions were governed by things beyond our control. So, how could one be punished for a crime that is not committed out of one's own free will? Unfortunately, that is the ugly truth we have to live with. We just cannot afford to compromise even if a crime is not attributable to any evil root. The thing is, if one is born with a propensity to commit crime, he is thus a dangerous thing. And we don't want dangerous things to be lurking around and be a threat to other members of the society. Anything dangerous should be contained or better still eliminated. A killer should be locked away, or better still, be killed in return, so that he'll not kill more of others. Being born with a killing gene is simply his own misfortune which makes him unsuitable to be fit into the system. And what doesn't fit, has to be emoved. After all, there are plenty of human beings on this planet to spare, and we certainly can do away those malfunctioning individuals whose existence are not helpful to the well-being of others. Sounds kind of cruel? Human right protagonists may call me “Hitler”. But I have one simple question for them to think about: If a human being takes away the rights of other human beings, should he be given what he takes away from others? In fact, being cruel to be kind is sanctioned in the law of nature. You see, nature does not discriminate between right and wrong when it comes to ensuring the survival of each species. For example, in the animal kingdom, a fish “gives birth” to millions of “babies” in anticipation for many that would die so as to allow a few to live. A praying mantis, while mating, offers his head to let his female partner much it off as food because he will be of no more use for her after he has done his duty of fertilizing her. As a matter of fact, most wild animals prey upon one another for survival. That is being cruel out of necessity. So, although I have implied that it might not be the fault of a person for having done a wrong , he still has to be made accountable regardless. We are part of nature and so we have to follow some of nature's rules.
  20. beautifulgown, There are a hundred and one things which can influence the thinking of a person. What more to say the very impressionable mind of a youngster. Thus, the old would think that the young is "be kia si" while the young would think that the old is "lau thau nau". This is what generation gap is about. As for your niece case, she may have her reasons which we don't understand. Of course I'm not saying that the reasons that we don't understand are correct. I knew a young man who always talked to me like he knew everything under the sun. But I just let him enjoy his egotism. There were times I nearly laughed myself to death at the stupid things he said, and yet he still thought that I had laughed because I was impressed by the amusing and inteligent things he said. I did try to tactfully sprinkle bits of corrective statement and wisdom into him every now and then. It worked somehow.
  21. meiteoh, Don't worry. Carry on with your dying. Ooops! I mean dyEing :P
  22. daddyo, Your observation on the deterioration of culture among our youths is very true. Our society seems to have lost all those fine traditional values of the yesteryears. It is a worrying trend, but then I wonder if it is an inevitable social change which is unstoppable just like a tide is unstoppable. By the way, are you familiar with that so-called Darwin's Theory of Evolution by Natural Selection which advocates survival of the fittest? When I think of how people fight to survive and how they compete to outdo one another, it does seem to indicate that the essence of Darwin's theory is increasingly valid. The human species has in fact take things a step further. To many people, life is no more about fighting just to survive. After having achieved the survival stage, they proceed to fight on to be the fittest by amassing wealth, power, and fame. And in their pursuit of these goals; the real values of life is either forgotten or trashed. As a result, one of the by-products of such a “kiasu” syndrome is, disrespectful youngsters. These youths maybe overflowing with buckets of knowledge. But wisdom? Not even a trickle.
  23. Just drop in here to say hello to daddyo and meiteoh. No time for lenghthy talk yet. daddyo, I know what you meant when you hinted that I could step on a lot of toes. And I think I know which kind of people you are referring to. This topic can be extremely sensitive if one is to read between the lines. Anyway, I fully compromise with your say regarding freedom of choice. meiteoh, I nearly jumped out of my skin to read what you said you got to do. Cos I initially read the word "dyeing" without the "e". LOL!
  24. Sometime ago, I said I would write something on "human's freedom of choice". So, here it goes: FREEDOM OF CHOICE? Are we really free to choose? It is easy to take for granted that what we decide to do every now and then is done out of our own free will. We encounter options and then we are free to choose which option to take. We can also choose to do good or bad, and the consequences of things to come are the products of our choices. But are choices we make really done out of a free will? Are all the present state of beings in our life the consequences of our free will choices? SHORT STORY Let me share a short story about a friend of mine named Desmond, and his wife named Isah. Desmond once told me he married Isah all because of a chicken shit. I burst out laughing, but he looked me grimly in the eye and said he was not joking. Then he told me how it all happened. The whole thing started when Desmond was in Form 5 in a sub-urban school. During a recess time one morning, he was walking to the school canteen when he accidentally stepped on a spat of chicken shit. His friends erupted into laughter and dispersed leaving him alone to face a flock of giggling girls who happened to pass by and saw what happened. One of the girls, who happened to be Isah, then handed him a sachet of tissue papers which he blushingly accepted. The next day he handed out a ringgit to Isah to pay for her tissue papers, but she declined to take the money and jokingly told him to regard it as a prize he won for his super good luck. From that day on, they became friends which gradually developed into ... well, need I say more? They eventually got married and lived happily ever after. My friend confessed to me that he was touched by Isah's kindness. I tell you that story because I want ask you a question: Did Desmond choose to step on that chicken shit? He didn't, of course, but that was the starting point that led him to finally marry Isah, wasn't it? Of course he could still have chosen not to marry that Isah. But that's not the point here. The point is, if he had not stepped on that chicken shit, would he even be presented with an opportunity to choose not to marry Isah? CHOICELESS CIRCUMSTANCES There are many things in the world which are not the products of choices. For example, did you choose to be born in the first place? And after you were born, did you choose to be you? Your overall characters such as the way you look, the way you behave, and the way you think, and of course the way you make choices, are, in one way or another, fashioned out by your genetic make-up, your family, your upbringing, your culture, your religion, your education, your environment, etc. Even something as ordinary as deciding whether to have a dinner at KFC or a seafood restaurant may also be the product of a set of factors collaborating to make you choose one decision over the other. Take another scenario for instance: A boy is born in a ghetto. Then he grows up to be a criminal? Is that the vocation of his choice? What if the same kid is born in a luxurious estate to a wealthy family, would he still grow up to be a criminal? INSTINCT Animals' behaviors are driven by instinct. Anthropologists or psychologists would tell us that we still have a lot of animal in us; which explains why we behave like animals sometimes. Charles Darwin theorized that we have evolved from an ape-like creature. Thus, many of our instincts, like the way we react to threats, avoid dangers, fight for survival, are very similar to those of the animals. Thus, might it not be that our decisions and actions are also the products of instincts? BRAIN MIND Finally, let us use our brain to think about our brain. The brain makes the mind, and the mind makes choices. The operation of the brain is undertaken by the billions of its interconnected nerve cells. When neuroscientists delve into how the brain works, they discover that the choices a person makes is largely also determined by the brain chemistry and neurological programming. Thus, might it not be that the choices we make are actually the programmed response of our brain? If we now put together all the factors which I have mentioned (factors that influence how we make choices) how much is left for a free will choice? A question which you might want to ask me now is: Does it all mean that a person is not accountable for his actions? Or more precisely, is it justified to punish someone who has committed a crime? I shall attempt to answer those questions based on my own opinion some other time. Meanwhile, anyone can have their say if they have anything to say on this topic.
  25. meiteoh and daddyo, I have read what you two said about the education system. In fact I have tons and tons of things to say on the topic. So much so until I don't know where to start and how to begin. But I'll come to it when I can find the time. There is one thing I want to confess to you two though: That I'm not lucky enough to have attained an education as high as that of you two. Mine is only up to Form 5 level. At that time, it was called the Senior Cambridge. Well, we were dirt poor then, so I didn't go for further study. So, if my English is gibberish, please excuse me.
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