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Finally the meet the parents were done but both paiseh to negotiate on dowry etc.. Problem now, me & FH kept on being the messanger for both side. At first me & FH wants something simple like 20 tables and no need any tables for my side (cause damn lots of relatives), just dowry.

FH's parent will pay for banquet of 20 tables and give 3 to my parents. Now my parents say they want to add extra with their own cost. Problem is, I'm pretty sure, by the end of day, will certainly quarrel about the angpow later. :wacko3: Future in laws already agreed not going to have beer or liquor, only red wine, which is what we wanted. But if 'gabung' the tables with my parents, they wanted beer & liquor pulak. My parents are really difficult on this matter especially my father. :sauer2: Just had a big quarrel with them.

What should I do?

What's the standard dowry? Usually is it inclusive of biscuits & other stuffs already, or my FH still have to pay the biscuit eventhough given dowry? For hokkien got give 2 bottle hard liquor meh (my mum asked for it). :dash2:

Please help, as I really don't want my future-in-laws to think that my family is one blood-sucking family. Especially my FH's mother already wanted to pay some money for our new home.

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I agree with dreamz, have a separate dinner that should be able to solve the problem.

Combine dinner owes hav problem, unless both side had an agreement or agree on the arrangement.

For my case, it is a combine table and we are the one who foot the bill, thus we make all the decision.

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for mine, its combined but me n hubby foot bill so whatever we give they take.

as for hung bao all also we take back..dun need argue =x

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I'm a hokkien too.. about the 2 bottles of liquor, its not about hokkien or not. My mum asked for 2 bottles of liquor too. This are her requirement, she wants my HB to send some fruits and 2 bottles of liquor on the Go Dai Lai day (plus the dowry of coz). Other thing like nuts etc are not necessary but if wan can send too.

My MIL said its too plain to just send the fruits and liquor, so she ask HB to bring along some 'fatt choi', 'fat gou' etc....

On the wedding dinner, we have combine dinner. But payment is separate, meaning, the angpow receives by bride side, bride's family keep, angpow receives by groom side, groom's family keep. My side (bride side) pay for the total table we used, HB (groom side) pay for the total number of table they used. No quarrel.

On the liquor, HB sponsor 1 box of mattel and 10 bottles of Jack Daniels + Johnny Walker and 3 boxes of carlsberg. My my family sponsor 3 boxes of red wine. All liquor and wine to be shared by both side.

On the biscuits, i pay for it on my own. I want to jaga both side's feelings, so me have to korban sikit lo.

Other than that, there are a lot of things that i pay with my own money. HB has spend a lot on the dowry, liquor, room renovation etc. Those that i feel i am able to pay, i pay. No need to kira so much or follow so much of what the tradition says, for example husband must pay for furniture while wife must pay for bedsheet and deco stuff...

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Thanks for all your suggestions. I'm thinking to ask for 2 separate dinner. So my FH side won't give any tables during the actual day and I'm thinking on top of dowry maybe add cost of 3 tables (around Rm1500) to my parents loh, like already gave them the tables. Think this can do? Cause my parent's thinking it's either 8 tables or leave it.

Let's say already gave my mum the dowry, means the biscuit will be settled by mum? Or my FH still have to pay? We're still unsure about how much is the standard dowry. Anyone can tell me?

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I'm a hokkien too.. about the 2 bottles of liquor, its not about hokkien or not. My mum asked for 2 bottles of liquor too. This are her requirement, she wants my HB to send some fruits and 2 bottles of liquor on the Go Dai Lai day (plus the dowry of coz). Other thing like nuts etc are not necessary but if wan can send too.

My MIL said its too plain to just send the fruits and liquor, so she ask HB to bring along some 'fatt choi', 'fat gou' etc....

On the wedding dinner, we have combine dinner. But payment is separate, meaning, the angpow receives by bride side, bride's family keep, angpow receives by groom side, groom's family keep. My side (bride side) pay for the total table we used, HB (groom side) pay for the total number of table they used. No quarrel.

On the liquor, HB sponsor 1 box of mattel and 10 bottles of Jack Daniels + Johnny Walker and 3 boxes of carlsberg. My my family sponsor 3 boxes of red wine. All liquor and wine to be shared by both side.

On the biscuits, i pay for it on my own. I want to jaga both side's feelings, so me have to korban sikit lo.

Other than that, there are a lot of things that i pay with my own money. HB has spend a lot on the dowry, liquor, room renovation etc. Those that i feel i am able to pay, i pay. No need to kira so much or follow so much of what the tradition says, for example husband must pay for furniture while wife must pay for bedsheet and deco stuff...

Hmm.. how about roast pig? Hokkien style also right?

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I'm a hokkien too.. about the 2 bottles of liquor, its not about hokkien or not. My mum asked for 2 bottles of liquor too. This are her requirement, she wants my HB to send some fruits and 2 bottles of liquor on the Go Dai Lai day (plus the dowry of coz). Other thing like nuts etc are not necessary but if wan can send too.

My MIL said its too plain to just send the fruits and liquor, so she ask HB to bring along some 'fatt choi', 'fat gou' etc....

On the wedding dinner, we have combine dinner. But payment is separate, meaning, the angpow receives by bride side, bride's family keep, angpow receives by groom side, groom's family keep. My side (bride side) pay for the total table we used, HB (groom side) pay for the total number of table they used. No quarrel.

On the liquor, HB sponsor 1 box of mattel and 10 bottles of Jack Daniels + Johnny Walker and 3 boxes of carlsberg. My my family sponsor 3 boxes of red wine. All liquor and wine to be shared by both side.

On the biscuits, i pay for it on my own. I want to jaga both side's feelings, so me have to korban sikit lo.

Other than that, there are a lot of things that i pay with my own money. HB has spend a lot on the dowry, liquor, room renovation etc. Those that i feel i am able to pay, i pay. No need to kira so much or follow so much of what the tradition says, for example husband must pay for furniture while wife must pay for bedsheet and deco stuff...

Hmm.. how about roast pig? Hokkien style also right?

Yes, my HB brings 1 roast pig when he comes to fetch me on the 'chut men' morning.

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biscuit still by FH if u want to count exactly the tradition.

some people will jsut avoid that with an angpow writing ' ka lui peng' or ' roast pig' to replace lo..

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The amount of dowry is very subjective, it can range from few hundred to a huge amount depending on the financial status of the couple and in some cases, it was paid by the groom's parents.

As for GDL, generally the groom side have to provide the following items for the bride:-

a) Dowry

b) KLP (amount as per request by the bride side)

c) Chicken (some give roasted pig as well)

d) Liquor

e) 8 types of "hou yi tao" items like lin ji, bak hup, longan yuke, fa sang, thai ji, kat bang, honey, hung jou n etc)

f) 4 types of dried seafood like fatt choy, hou si, abalone, sea cucumber, scallops n etc

g) fatt gou

h) fruits

i) kuih-muih like ang gu, jin duin n etc

j) Lung fung juk

k) Red cloth for the bride side to hang the day before ad

Having said that, you may discard some of the items if you have a tight budget for gdl. Item (f) is definitely optional while the amount for item (a) can be discounted based on your affordability.

Hope it helps!! :lol:

biscuit still by FH if u want to count exactly the tradition.

some people will jsut avoid that with an angpow writing ' ka lui peng' or ' roast pig' to replace lo..

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The amount of dowry is very subjective, it can range from few hundred to a huge amount depending on the financial status of the couple and in some cases, it was paid by the groom's parents.

As for GDL, generally the groom side have to provide the following items for the bride:-

a) Dowry RM1000 add another RM1500 for bride side's table)

b) KLP (amount as per request by the bride side) RM???

c) Chicken (some give roasted pig as well) ROast Pig ~RM600

d) Liquor ~RM300

e) 8 types of "hou yi tao" items like lin ji, bak hup, longan yuke, fa sang, thai ji, kat bang, honey, hung jou n etc) ~RM30

f) 4 types of dried seafood like fatt choy, hou si, abalone, sea cucumber, scallops n etc (take out)

g) fatt gou (RM5)

h) fruits (RM15)

i) kuih-muih like ang gu, jin duin n etc (take out)

j) Lung fung juk (take out)

k) Red cloth for the bride side to hang the day before ad (RM???)

Having said that, you may discard some of the items if you have a tight budget for gdl. Item (f) is definitely optional while the amount for item (a) can be discounted based on your affordability.

Hope it helps!! :lol:

biscuit still by FH if u want to count exactly the tradition.

some people will jsut avoid that with an angpow writing ' ka lui peng' or ' roast pig' to replace lo..

Wah.. so many things.

Lung Fung Juk? I think I should miss that out :wacko3: no point getting something I'm not going to wear.

My bf's parents will pay but ask him to buy the stuffs and settle the dowry etc, cause that's what his bro did last time. So now, we're really sesat. How much does biscuit usually cost per box and the most 'normal' is how many boxes, or must we count the relatives?

Above, I've put some estimation of money to spend. Can comment on that?

Thanks. Honestly I'm just looking forward for the honey moon nia :lol:

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Wah.. so many things.

Lung Fung Juk? I think I should miss that out :wacko3: no point getting something I'm not going to wear.

My bf's parents will pay but ask him to buy the stuffs and settle the dowry etc, cause that's what his bro did last time. So now, we're really sesat. How much does biscuit usually cost per box and the most 'normal' is how many boxes, or must we count the relatives?

Above, I've put some estimation of money to spend. Can comment on that?

Thanks. Honestly I'm just looking forward for the honey moon nia :lol:

Hahha, fraulein, you dun wear the Lung Fung Juk. Its for prayers. Lung Fung Juk is the 'colok'. Have you mistaken it for Lung Fung Ngak?

On the biscuit, it depends on how many relative and frens you wan to give to. In my case, i dun give to my fren. We only send to some close relatives, neighbours and keep some for prayers. Save cost lo. Furthermore, i dun think they are going to eat the biscuit. Like when my frens send their Ka Lui Beng to me, i dun eat the biscuits, just put there and after sometime, throw it. So, for me, i think no point to waste money to buy Ka Lui Beng and send to everyone. Just those close close one enough. Its only a tradition ma.

Thats my opinion la. It depends on what you think.

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Wah.. so many things.

Lung Fung Juk? I think I should miss that out :wacko3: no point getting something I'm not going to wear.

My bf's parents will pay but ask him to buy the stuffs and settle the dowry etc, cause that's what his bro did last time. So now, we're really sesat. How much does biscuit usually cost per box and the most 'normal' is how many boxes, or must we count the relatives?

Above, I've put some estimation of money to spend. Can comment on that?

Thanks. Honestly I'm just looking forward for the honey moon nia :lol:

Hahha, fraulein, you dun wear the Lung Fung Juk. Its for prayers. Lung Fung Juk is the 'colok'. Have you mistaken it for Lung Fung Ngak?

On the biscuit, it depends on how many relative and frens you wan to give to. In my case, i dun give to my fren. We only send to some close relatives, neighbours and keep some for prayers. Save cost lo. Furthermore, i dun think they are going to eat the biscuit. Like when my frens send their Ka Lui Beng to me, i dun eat the biscuits, just put there and after sometime, throw it. So, for me, i think no point to waste money to buy Ka Lui Beng and send to everyone. Just those close close one enough. Its only a tradition ma.

Thats my opinion la. It depends on what you think.

Haha sorry :cool: my cantonese is still :wub: , so I mistook those as the 'ngak'.

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Wah.. so many things.

Lung Fung Juk? I think I should miss that out :wacko3: no point getting something I'm not going to wear.

My bf's parents will pay but ask him to buy the stuffs and settle the dowry etc, cause that's what his bro did last time. So now, we're really sesat. How much does biscuit usually cost per box and the most 'normal' is how many boxes, or must we count the relatives?

Above, I've put some estimation of money to spend. Can comment on that?

Thanks. Honestly I'm just looking forward for the honey moon nia :lol:

Hahha, fraulein, you dun wear the Lung Fung Juk. Its for prayers. Lung Fung Juk is the 'colok'. Have you mistaken it for Lung Fung Ngak?

On the biscuit, it depends on how many relative and frens you wan to give to. In my case, i dun give to my fren. We only send to some close relatives, neighbours and keep some for prayers. Save cost lo. Furthermore, i dun think they are going to eat the biscuit. Like when my frens send their Ka Lui Beng to me, i dun eat the biscuits, just put there and after sometime, throw it. So, for me, i think no point to waste money to buy Ka Lui Beng and send to everyone. Just those close close one enough. Its only a tradition ma.

Thats my opinion la. It depends on what you think.

Haha sorry :cool: my cantonese is still :wub: , so I mistook those as the 'ngak'.

NO NO.. its not colok... its candle... its 'dragon and phoenix candle' not colok...

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Wah.. so many things.

Lung Fung Juk? I think I should miss that out :wacko3: no point getting something I'm not going to wear.

My bf's parents will pay but ask him to buy the stuffs and settle the dowry etc, cause that's what his bro did last time. So now, we're really sesat. How much does biscuit usually cost per box and the most 'normal' is how many boxes, or must we count the relatives?

Above, I've put some estimation of money to spend. Can comment on that?

Thanks. Honestly I'm just looking forward for the honey moon nia :lol:

Hahha, fraulein, you dun wear the Lung Fung Juk. Its for prayers. Lung Fung Juk is the 'colok'. Have you mistaken it for Lung Fung Ngak?

On the biscuit, it depends on how many relative and frens you wan to give to. In my case, i dun give to my fren. We only send to some close relatives, neighbours and keep some for prayers. Save cost lo. Furthermore, i dun think they are going to eat the biscuit. Like when my frens send their Ka Lui Beng to me, i dun eat the biscuits, just put there and after sometime, throw it. So, for me, i think no point to waste money to buy Ka Lui Beng and send to everyone. Just those close close one enough. Its only a tradition ma.

Thats my opinion la. It depends on what you think.

Haha sorry :cool: my cantonese is still :wub: , so I mistook those as the 'ngak'.

NO NO.. its not colok... its candle... its 'dragon and phoenix candle' not colok...

:oops::oops:

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fraulein,

I will putting this on the main table for dinner. Kinda sayang wanna burn these candles, it is not cheap ah! over RM60 for a pair.

Lung fung juk is candle =P I had a pair

candley.jpg

I saw that before when my auntie got married years ago...

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Hi read this title and attract me to share my little brother story over here

I got to know my bro's wedding so mess when I was back to attend the wedding. I thought everything discussion between both side was done but instead nope. When I'm back, my mum start to tell me all the lotta story about my bro's wedding. My SIL's parent wish their daughter to marry such a traditional wedding. Since both the bride and groom agree,

we have no objection of it. So they need to hire ' tai kam chech' cost RM 350 ( which I found no a necessary) , hoi min , get

one boy one girl jump on the bed, and other stuff. ( I'm not sure this all stuff cost how much)

Girls side mother's requirement keep changing and it's make too much trouble for us to prepare ( although they did meet up and disccus about the dowry and so on). The funny thing is when my mum ask my SIL's parent wat they need but they just asnwer 'cincai lahh anything will do lahh, I'm married out my girl not sell out my girl'.

So with this my SIL ( being a messenger) get an information from her parent and discuss with my brother. I got to know,

my bro give GDL dowry RM 6K, a set of jewellery,2 bottle liquour, 400pcs of biscuit (perbox contain 100 pcs cost RM 90 ), 24 oranges, 2 pair of lung fung chuk, 3 ang pow ( one for mum's breast feed , one big angpow for family ji mui and kau jai hai), and other stuff like dried stuff, kuih and so on. I guess for dowry my bro spend nearly RM 10K. The worst part is, on the wedding day we need to prepare exactly the same thing as GDL stuff to pick up the bride ( beside the dowry , jewellery and that 3 big angpow lah) :dash2: . Everything seem double and I found it's such a waste of money.

Futhermore, about dinner stuff; 3 days before the wedding, my brother with sudden told my mum he need to top up another 3 table for the lady side ( beforehand they discuss to give FOC 3 table for bride's family only). FYI, they agree to seperately arrange the dinner by own. I and my mum shock and ask my bro how we can do that. We already make a confirmation and booking and all stuff being well plan and with sudden the bride side last minute want another 3 table. The reason is the bride parent said, beside the grandma is respective in the family, they need to invite 'tai kung or wat Sam Ku or Lok Po' to witness the wedding. :ohmy: . Arent they will do at the dinner by themself before our dinner? Sometime I felt the bride's mother seem 'BIG MOUTH'. I got piss off and scold my bro arent they ( my bro & SIL) discuss properly before the marriage? I insist my bro to ask her wife wat else they need. I dont like to prepare stuff especially in the last minute time. They alot's stuff happen during the wedding and as I know, I witness my brother to give out the ang pow none stop. Furthermore, the ang pow contain not a RM 2 or RM 5. It's much more of it. :sauer2:. I felt so pity witth my bro using so much money on his wedding day. Come on we arent from rich family, ok!

Fraulein, it's a best way you and ur hubby make the decision on ur own by asking your parent requirement, then later u 2 discuss especially u 2 financial and decide the end. After the discussion, you and ur FH inform your parent u 2 decision and as long as your decision is well enuff to satisfied both requirement. ( That's my point of view lah). Please dont let parent to ruin u 2 wedding. Parent requirement never stop demanding due to they want to 'hou hou tai tai ' wedding. :cool:. They dont want to lose face mahh.....

Best luck to you and ur FH

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cloudy

hmm i think tis kind of gdl stuff, there is no saying tat tis need or not. since u wan to follow tradisional.

then there is a long list of purchase to follow.

if ur bro so reluctant to give (or think they r unnecessary), then just told his MIL directly.

no point gave then complain. but i do agree tat MIL was too "over" when demanded extra 3 tables at last min.

Whatever bride's mum requested, she just wan "hoi yi" for her daugther (wan face or not tat is another story)

like my mum, both site really dint discuss much, but some gdl stuff mum insist must have, cos those symbolise good fortune & happiness. FH also dint complain much, so long as they r within his budget. cos FH knew how troublesome those "custom" is also for my benefit & our marriage.... if u really believe in all this chinese custom.

but high volume of biscuit, no of table, dowry $$.. haha tat i dunno lar. i know alot of couple quarel bcos of these stuff.

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Hi davinci,

My family side dont mind whatever the bride's family request. For your information, not my family the one who request to follow old tradition; it's the bride side requested. My bro did so much thing to pleased his FMIL due to this I felt my mum being bully by bride side. The worst is the bride's mum do not really tell us wat they want. It depend on our side to found out. Ask my SIL she just told us half this and half that ( bad messenger - sorry to say that)

When the GDL time arrive, when the bride's mum and aunty found out there something missing ( I'm not sure what is the thing oledi ), they directly ask my bro and my mum how come we do not prepare it. At the moment my mum felt so miserable and tell them that their side do not mention and requested such of the thing.

The angrier part is my SIL's mum 'perli' my mum saying, arent you married out ur daughter b4 ( that's me). How come my mum do not really alert of it. Hello!!! come on lahhh my mum not such a BIG MOUTH person to request so many thing from my husband. By the way different culture different request mah. For an example, for Hakka or Hokkein ppls they need the most ' PIG' when chuet mun, for Teow Chew ppls the specific to have alot of ' KA LUI PHENG' and so on

to others rite?

For my wedding time, I do all the messenger and negotiator with my mum. I do ask her wat she wants and I try my best

to fullfill her requirement. If such thing unneccessary, I will direct told my mum I wouldnt give this and that or will replace with other thing . I understand our parent who marry out the daughter wish to have a gd 'hoi yi' on her wedding time but the truth is I really dont want my FPIL have a other thought of my mum (being greedy).

Beside, I witness my mum to find my relative ( need a couple )carry me out from my house ' chuet mun'. Old tradition said, if our parent is single parent he or she cannot carry out the bride to the groom. I marry outstation so quite alot of relative cannot attend and help my mum. I'm so sad to see my mum to beg the ppl. At last, I told my mum I dont want to follow the

tradition and I want my mum to carry me out no matter how. Although my dad passed away earlier, my mum is my dad as well. So it's no harm rite? This incident my PIL got to know it as well. They do not comment at all, since the reason I give

is reasonable.

Just a simple advise and reminder, whatever our parent request from our husband and it need spend so much $$, please

spare our husband's pocket. The more money he use the more debt we together have to cover. I witness my bro and SIL to pay credit card debts now just to fullfill his MIL. As long as our parent request isnt over, then we have to do it ( Anyhow our parent the one who really take gd care of us, rite?)

:ohmy: do not realise i write so long stuff over here... pai seh ahhh :cool:

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Beside, I witness my mum to find my relative ( need a couple )carry me out from my house ' chuet mun'. Old tradition said, if our parent is single parent he or she cannot carry out the bride to the groom. I marry outstation so quite alot of relative cannot attend and help my mum. I'm so sad to see my mum to beg the ppl. At last, I told my mum I dont want to follow the

tradition and I want my mum to carry me out no matter how. Although my dad passed away earlier, my mum is my dad as well. So it's no harm rite? This incident my PIL got to know it as well. They do not comment at all, since the reason I give

is reasonable.

haa? single parent cannot "carry out" the bride ah? ohh... then really mafan. cos my dad already passed away :sad:

haha i do understand ur frustration, u saw ur bro & mum being buli by bride side. aiya u should perli d Mil back. hahaha. sorry.

tat y during "dai cheng" list everything out & just follow it. :lol:

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hi fraulein,

hope i'm not too late to comment.

my situation was exactly like yours. the only thing is, terbalik, my parents are like his parents anything also can accomodate while his parents were the ones demanding a lot....

our solution, was to have a separate dinner. we do it out way i.e. no alcohol, no kareoke & our own choice of venue.

my parents principle is, is our wedding, the bride & groom should decide

his parents thinks, that bride & groom only need to turn up on that day & need not get involve in the prep cos it's their event. if we offer help means we are ungrateful children "ng chui jung lo yan ka yee sii".

anyway, on the matter of dowry, my parents were smart. they insist that my hubs pay, no matter how little (hundreds also nvm).

however, ended up my in laws worry loose face, so they insist on paying, but my hubs set one condition - must never in future say that my hub "mo pun si" (no ability) to "chui" me & need to depend on my FIL's money (my MIL said that about my hub's elder brother, we don't want the same thing to happen to us).

what i can suggest u do is that u convince your parents that the dowry is coming from your hubs. either name a price or he'll give nominal like RM888, RM1888, RM2888 or something like that.

KLP - my parents ask for only 12 boxes (again, my parents were playing poker with my in laws), enough for prayers. 1 box usually contains 2 pieces, one pink one yellow, cost about RM4.50 per box. can get them from any cake shop, bakery, thong kee, or long fung. again, my in laws worries about face & gave 80 boxes, but minus 16 or something like tat which they keep b4 "go tai lai" to us for prayers.

here u can ask ur mom whether she wants to go from house to house on the same day of go tai lai to give out all the biscuits. reason being, the biscuits usually comes in boxes that are not seal like the mooncakes. u can't keep long, i.e. not more than a day or 2. u need to give out immediately.... then consider how many relatives' hse u want to go on that same day? i covered about 20 hse, ok... not easyleh... but can't keep at home also, otherwise biscuits tak sedap.

this one u can quietly pay yourself.

what my hubs & i planned during our wedding was to cut down on the money that we give our parents, so that in any case, all these disputes, we can wip out our credit card & sign immediately.

for all other "traditional" things during go tai lai or chut mun, u worry u may forget, have RM10 angpows ready, to represent all those stuffs e.g. life chicken, some lin ji pak hup stuffs etc...

one trick is have lots of angpow in different denominations on standby especially RM2, RM5 & RM10...

reason being something u need to give double angpow (i.e. 2 becomes 4, & 5 becomes 10) for things like is tai kam je bring u a glass or water or something like that... no need to give too much.... if u can 2 RM1 angpow also nvm...

hope this helps...

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haa? single parent cannot "carry out" the bride ah? ohh... then really mafan. cos my dad already passed away :sad:

haha i do understand ur frustration, u saw ur bro & mum being buli by bride side. aiya u should perli d Mil back. hahaha. sorry.

tat y during "dai cheng" list everything out & just follow it. :lol:

Sigh.....I wish I was there to stand up for them but when I knew it's too late already. Just knew it when I was back attend the wedding and saw all the wedding plan so messy. I voice out and quiery my mum and bro then only the moment they voice out the whole story. No wander my bro do not wish me to come back and help him to do the GLD. The reason he gave me was I'm far a way and dont want to bothering me. :lol: mayb he scare I will even mess up the condition..... ehehehh....

About the single parent cannot 'carry out' the bride or groom, old ppls believe that the couple destiny might be as the parent also ( Husband or wife may die early).Other mean is the couple not 'cheong cheong kau kau'. Not so good 'yi tao'. If you really follow the tradition like my bro, then you have to find a couple ( ur aunty or uncle -relative or ur elder bro or elder sister -marry) to represent your mum to carry you out. As for my bro he is lucky, I'm married. Then I and my hubby do all the 'carry' for him.

As for me, I dont really follow. I dont really believe in much of pantang larang or mayb I got this idea

when I saw my fren's wedding at church. Her dad carry her inside to her hubby.

Think back the funniest thing for my GDL, I and my mum did all the buying. My hubby just do the billing and bought the liquor only. My husband leave so far and not convenient for him to bring so much stuff on the way to my home or mayb I think is the best way I brought my mum for shopping and nothing will left out later during the GDL.

When he and his family arrive outside my home, I directly bring out all the GDL stuff and asked him bring it inside again. :lol: . See there wont be anymore misunderstanding whether the groom side will left out anything important and later both side felt uneasy to each other later.

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haa? single parent cannot "carry out" the bride ah? ohh... then really mafan. cos my dad already passed away :sad:

haha i do understand ur frustration, u saw ur bro & mum being buli by bride side. aiya u should perli d Mil back. hahaha. sorry.

tat y during "dai cheng" list everything out & just follow it. :lol:

Sigh.....I wish I was there to stand up for them but when I knew it's too late already. Just knew it when I was back attend the wedding and saw all the wedding plan so messy. I voice out and quiery my mum and bro then only the moment they voice out the whole story. No wander my bro do not wish me to come back and help him to do the GLD. The reason he gave me was I'm far a way and dont want to bothering me. :lol: mayb he scare I will even mess up the condition..... ehehehh....

About the single parent cannot 'carry out' the bride or groom, old ppls believe that the couple destiny might be as the parent also ( Husband or wife may die early).Other mean is the couple not 'cheong cheong kau kau'. Not so good 'yi tao'. If you really follow the tradition like my bro, then you have to find a couple ( ur aunty or uncle -relative or ur elder bro or elder sister -marry) to represent your mum to carry you out. As for my bro he is lucky, I'm married. Then I and my hubby do all the 'carry' for him.

As for me, I dont really follow. I dont really believe in much of pantang larang or mayb I got this idea

when I saw my fren's wedding at church. Her dad carry her inside to her hubby.

Think back the funniest thing for my GDL, I and my mum did all the buying. My hubby just do the billing and bought the liquor only. My husband leave so far and not convenient for him to bring so much stuff on the way to my home or mayb I think is the best way I brought my mum for shopping and nothing will left out later during the GDL.

When he and his family arrive outside my home, I directly bring out all the GDL stuff and asked him bring it inside again. :lol: . See there wont be anymore misunderstanding whether the groom side will left out anything important and later both side felt uneasy to each other later.

Hahahah i'm like you. I bought the GDL things and ask HB to send to my house. I booked the KLP on my own and collect it a day b4 the GDL, then send it to HB's house so that he can send to my house the nex day. Then the Lung Fung Zuk also i bought when i went shopping with my mum to buy wedding's things.

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