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Bao B

I'm so tired and disappointed...

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Here's how I look at it:

NC

Pros

Lots of kids so good for socialization and learning people-related skills

Certified caregivers

Wide range of syllabus and activities catering for child development

Cons

Lots of kids also mean higher exposure to sickness

Cost

Huge waiting list for some NCs

Not easily available in some areas

Nanny

Pros

Can be cheaper than NC

One-on-one care

Limits exposure to sickness

Cons

Lack of socialization and people-related skills coz limited exposure to other kids

Nanny can be un-trained so may not know a lot about child development

Need to provide things like solid food and etc on top of the cost

I wouldn't mind sending my child to a nursery PROVIDED their immune system can take it. I know of many mummies here who send their kids to infant centers (like nursery) only to pull them out a few months down the road because their babies were getting sick almost every month. So it really depends on you and your baby.

The reality is nanny nowadays do not take care of one child only. So i feel its not much difference compared to nursery. Further more nursery charges are slightly cheaper than nanny in some cases.

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Meringue,

My sociality as in other kids will come and talk to my bb, hold his hand.. so he see many ppl everyday. hence he is not scared of stranger and can be carried by anyone. For eg., my niece who only taken care by her grandma, whenever she see us she will cry. Only her parents and grandparents she wont cry.. but i know not all kids are like that la..my nephew is alright with anyone although he is taken care by one nanny (one-to-one basis)

S_y, yes u speak what I'm thinking too. Initially my parents did not agree to send to NC. I did tried to look for nanny too, but most of the nannies already taken care 1-2 bb/kids. In fact, my NC charge cheaper than those nanny. RM600 per month even though started solid food still the same price. I understand most of the nanny will charge RM50-100 more once start on solid. Nanny charges are depends on area too. My area is slightly higher from RM700-RM800 Mon-Fri day. For day and night cost RM1k-1.2k

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*nods*

Yup, nannies who take care of just one baby are few - need to look but here in SG, you can still find. In fact, for me as a foreigner, a nanny is cheaper BUT difficult to find (my place especially susah - nearest one involves me taking a bus and then walk/MRT, etc) compared to NCs which are available everywhere. I just called to ask about an NC opposite my block and the charge is $1200 (it's only half price for Singaporeans and PRs), all day Mon-Fri and Sat half day. If don't want Saturday, still the same price. Hai hai.

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Ok just to share this with u gals, one of my relative is also a nanny ( not my nanny I mentioned) ..she is very well known and everybody look for her to take care babies...she can take care 3 to 4 kids or babies at one time ! but her house is very dirty while nobody knowing that ..u know why? coz everytime mummies come to pick babies, she quickily bring bb out and chat with them outside so very rare got mummies to go in the house...

she let all the babies wear neaty, hair comb nicely and wear lotion or powder untill all babies are very nice smell ! u know what I mean ? so nobody knowing that her house and environment is dirty... so this is called "nanny" ??? ( no offence to anyone here, just to share my experience/what I saw before )

But I believe not all nannies like that...depends on our luck and same go with nursery ! haiz....so depends on luck !!!

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Meringue,

My sociality as in other kids will come and talk to my bb, hold his hand.. so he see many ppl everyday. hence he is not scared of stranger and can be carried by anyone. For eg., my niece who only taken care by her grandma, whenever she see us she will cry. Only her parents and grandparents she wont cry.. but i know not all kids are like that la..my nephew is alright with anyone although he is taken care by one nanny (one-to-one basis)

S_y, yes u speak what I'm thinking too. Initially my parents did not agree to send to NC. I did tried to look for nanny too, but most of the nannies already taken care 1-2 bb/kids. In fact, my NC charge cheaper than those nanny. RM600 per month even though started solid food still the same price. I understand most of the nanny will charge RM50-100 more once start on solid. Nanny charges are depends on area too. My area is slightly higher from RM700-RM800 Mon-Fri day. For day and night cost RM1k-1.2k

Yes. My area too. 5 days week, nanny charges RM 700-800 for my area too.

If started on solid then have to add extra another RM 50-100.

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Puchong.. if u need further info PM me

macam like i promoting my NC now.. haha.. there are many PM me for info, some just told me they also agree with me that NC are better than nanny

but im actually not promoting.. i prefer not so many ppl send their kids to my NC.. so that they have less kids to take care and have more time for my bb. :D but of course if anyone need help let me know.

Most of the nanny/NC is from Mon-Fri.. but my NC do open half day on Sat to cater to those parents who work on sat. I never send my bb on sat but thinking to send this week.. got dr. appointment.. and want to start cleaning house for CNY oredi.. slowly do bit by bit each weekend

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Initially I wanted to send my girl to NC instead of nanny, after I do survey on those nearest NC, I brush off the idea. Im not saying that NC is not good, but so happened that those I visited is not the environment that I want my girl to grow up there.

The nursery was recommended by my friend, I purposely don't want to make appointment and spot check on the NC, I find the floor is dirty, they have those ABC rubber mat on the floor, claimed to be kids playing area and the mats are dirty. Plus the nursery caretaker told me if my girl can crawl, that's the area she will put my girl at to crawl. I cannot imagine my girl crawling on those dirty mats and floor and pick up some rubbish.

I also went to a nanny house, the house are clean and she only take care of one of her grandson at the moment. She charged RM600 a month. Everything seems quite good but in the end my aunt found out that the nanny is actually a SMOKER!!!

In the end, I managed to get a nanny that intro by FIL's ex-colleague, she charged RM500 for half day. Everyone saying that it is expensive, but at least I find them treat my girl well and their house are clean. Many has suggested other cheaper nanny but me and hb will stick to this one as we dont find any issue with her.

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yup lwcath, money is not an issue as long as our child is safe & sound. i wish could find someone i could trust too for a few hrs, but really cannot find! in the end, its easier for hubby to take leave when needed.

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i so agree with you yvonne118.. i myself send my then 3-months old son to the nursery. my MIL took care of my bb when i started work for 1 mth. then i had to find a place for my bb coz MIL was on leave for that 1 mth only. many suggestions to send him to family member/nanny than nursery. but personally, i prefer nursery (provided a good one) as they are well-trained on how to handle babies, EBM, etc. nanny/family member (esp. older ones) MAY not know the correct way to handle your EBM.

i went to few nurseries before deciding. the cheaper ones i went to, were not up to my liking. i ended up sending my bb to a nursery with less babies, with ratio of helper to baby is 1:2. ever since i sent my bb there, i never had any uneasy feeling. i am happy i send him there even tho it burns a hole in my pocket.

still, its up to your preference. some may prefer nanny, some may prefer nursery. so long as we get a good one, it puts a peace on our mind. we just have to search for it.

BaoB,

I do not know whether i should reply this.. if you want to know how others who send to nursery centre i'm the best person to ask for. I got many bad comments from fellow friends that 'I SHOULD NOT' send my bb to nursery centre, most of the ppl doubt on their service. But recently many of my friends ask me the contact cause they see how well they taken care my bb (from my bb skin, happy face always smile when back from nursery centre and so on) perhaps i will receive bad comment in this thread too eg. im a bad mother send bb to nursery centre and so on.. but if u personally want to know more u may PM me. but it seems like u have made up ur mind to find a new nanny, isn't it? im not saying all NC is good but the one im sending i personally feel good. i have no regrets.. i personally prefer nursery over nanny.. cause they are unprofessional.. they let bb watch tv so that they can do house chores and all.. feed bb adult food etc.. i personally feel im gonna worried more if i send to those aunty nanny. :) btw, i alws greet by the owner when i reach the NC, i not yet have to step into their gate even.. not that they dont let me in.. is they are too efficient to storm out from the house and get my EBM, clothes, and my bb..

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JUST RAMBLING

Sigh! It's a human dilemma. We have created a society which, in a way, is unnatural for human lives. In fact, human babies are designed to be nursed and looked after by their mothers at least from birth till toddler age. But many mothers cannot look after their babies because they have jobs away from home.

I have an engineer friend who asks his wife to stop working and look after their baby at home after the birth of their first child. That's only because he has a fat salary while his wife has only an ordinary-salaried job. He told me that, after some calculation, he found it not worth for his wife to go to work, after taking into account paying for a nanny, transportation, and other expenses incurred by a working person outside. "And how about the other high price which is not calculable?" he asks. What he means is the price of depriving the baby of a mother's care, and the price of exposing the baby to all sorts of negative situations when isolated from its natural mother.

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JUST RAMBLING

Sigh! It's a human dilemma. We have created a society which, in a way, is unnatural for human lives. In fact, human babies are designed to be nursed and looked after by their mothers at least from birth till toddler age. But many mothers cannot look after their babies because they have jobs away from home.

I have an engineer friend who asks his wife to stop working and look after their baby at home after the birth of their first child. That's only because he has a fat salary while his wife has only an ordinary-salaried job. He told me that, after some calculation, he found it not worth for his wife to go to work, after taking into account paying for a nanny, transportation, and other expenses incurred by a working person outside. "And how about the other high price which is not calculable?" he asks. What he means is the price of depriving the baby of a mother's care, and the price of exposing the baby to all sorts of negative situations when isolated from its natural mother.

truly agree with you apekjolly but at the end of the day, mothers are working to provide the good lifestyle for the baby that they deserve... with the modern society the need and wants for our baby/kid is growing, and by not having enuf income i might be depriving my child of that luxury

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apek, y'know, if I could have it my way, I wouldn't want to work at all. I'm an SAHM (been one for 8 mths and loved every moment of it) who is going back to work because of $$$ and not because I want to. At the end of the day, we have to make do with the situation that we're in.

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qarezma,

meiteoh,

That's what I meant by human dilemma; which is a situation in which both options seem to lead to a downside. This is a world where money talks. No money no talk, as people like to say. So, do doubt, chasing for the money to make life good for the family or to make a future for our children is a justifiable pursuit.

That is where the institution of nursery care should come in as a very crucial element to modern society. But I can see that our politics don't seem to give enough attention to this area of our lives. No serious effort has been made by the authorities to promote the establishment of adequate nursery care centres that are highly systematic and professional in their service. Imagine you have a place to leave your child where you know he or she would be taken care of in an even better manner than you yourself can do so, why not? Who doesn't want such a thing?

The problem is, by the time you may find one which is like that, the price will kill you. This is where the government can step in to offer a helping hand. The government can help by subsiding the cost of running nursery care centres and make it affordable for everyone. After all, a baby of today is a tomorrow of a country. Is it not pertinent, then, for the country to see it as its motherly responsibility to help to look after its babies? Again I can say that the political will isn't there. Our politics is involved too much in politicking itself that the original purpose of politics is forgotten. SIGH!

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Yes, that's the system in place in Singapore for their citizens and PR holders, and regulations are very strict in these places. All SG citizens have a subsidy of at least $700 so they end up paying only $500-700 (depending on the IC - infantcare) per month as compared to what I, a non-citizen, non-PR, would pay which is $2K.

Then there is the issue of maternity leave. In Europe, maternity leave can be from six months to a year - paid fully most of the time although I need to check the specifics - whereas it's a measly two months here. This doesn't allow mothers much time to bond with their babies and subsequently create a better environment/relationship for their children before bundling off to a caregiver.

I'd like to see this part of Asia hike up its salary pool for its workers. People here are really underpaid as compared to the climbing standards of living. With a proper and constantly fair salary, mothers do not have to face this dilemma at all...OR at least they have more time to decide if they want to head back to work or not.

In Asia, working hours are not conducive for raising a family as most people here work 40-42 hours. In Europe, it's 35 and women have the option of working full-time, or by percentage (80-20%). My step-MIL, as an example, goes in for work only three days a week and no one blinks an eye about it. Ignorant people may say that angmohs are lazy but they are one of the most efficient people I have worked with and observed so far. They may work shorter hours but in that span of hours, it's pure work and nothing else. Work-life balance is important in families and unfortunately here in Asia, many overlook this.

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Talking about the working hour. As in my uni we can have special arrangement with our own department/school either full day or in daily basis.

I know there are some new mummies who only work for a morning which all her classes are arranged in the morning slot and some only come in 3 days a week and all her classes are arranged in that 3 days.

I think it depends on the flexibility of your company/organisation, but not many are so flexible. They like to see 'cows' in the office whether you are productive or none-productive "cows" =D

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Education industry is more flexible than the private sector mah, Ling. Private sector is fixed - only full-time and if they can help, no working from home as well. *sigh*

*sorry to divert from the topic* It all started with apek la! (Just kidding...) :P

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granted that our families can survive and live ok with single income of hb's, who doesn't want to be at home with so much bonding time with bbies? after knowing that i got preg, i wanted to immediately quit my job. but it was not realistic at all. Both my mum and hb disagreed with that. mum's diagreement the strongest as she surely didn't want me to become a 'yellow-faced wife', and having no income. maybe she felt that i'd waste my education too. hb said it's coz we won't be able to survive on his single income yet. all these while, i have been in dilemma whether or not to become SAHM or FTWM. both really got lots of pros and cons, and seem to weigh each other for me. thus, since i can't choose. I let our financial situation choose for us. gotta work then.

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