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Coping with Miscarriages / D&C

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Hi all,

I have visited gynae on last friday and taken antifungal. few days later i hav mild spotting.. Anyone experience this? Please advise... feel so nervous...

Cheers

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Hi all,

I have visited gynae on last friday and taken antifungal. few days later i hav mild spotting.. Anyone experience this? Please advise... feel so nervous...

Cheers

hi rosanne, u mean u have spotting due to anti-fugal?

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Dear everyone here,

I cried as I read the posts here. Oh boy. Read and cry. Hold my empty stomach/womb and cry.

Meiteoh - sometimes mum can be the evil person (no idea why) they dont' think before they speak or do anything. Yea, I've been through that. Being a girl means nothing as compared to a son (my brother). Also, what I have, she will also want to have. Even a cheapo RM19 tights I bought from TESCO. But they are our parent, our mother. If they hate us that much, they would have killed us years ago. :wink:

Cheerio - I didn't know your story till I read this here. Thank you for replying to my post on MOM TO BE 2012. I hope we both will be pregnant nearing the same time :) And have our boy back with us. I gave mine a name too. Call me silly and I know it was a boy (don't know why I have vision of him).

Well, here is my story of MC.

27 May 2011 - last period (i have regular 28day cycle)

30 June 2011 - did pregnancy test at home. It was positive. Went to see Gyane B (not my regular, but near my office) and asked if I can run 7km on 3 July. She did a scan it was abt 4-5weeks pregnant and can't see anything. Is too early mar. She advice no running because no sac can be seen yet. risky. If U want to run make sure u keep cool and hydrate yourself. She concluded no run again before i left her clinic.

I went ahead to run. I know. someone please shot me. Again, I dun know if it is because of the run or not. But I brisk walk most of the time and drink water and breathe in and out. I brisk walk daily with my dog after work, so it was kinda normal for me.

All is well, I read up on pregnancy since this was not plan. Married for 6yrs no plan to have kids. I printed ou the pregnancy calender n kept it in my wallet to tick off each week. It felt good. HB and I are happy. We accept it as God's gift to us (as what we have agreed before accidental pregnancy can happen).

Plan to have the first real scan on 16 Jul (Sat).

either mon/tues - feel super bloated and can't buckle my jeans! very uncomfortable. Oh, it could be uterus stretching,etc.

13 July (wed) - 2 dot of blood on panties. Peed. Wipe - wow alot of blood on tissue. Panic. Called HB went straight to my regular gynae. Scan - saw a sac and one black dot. alot of fluid (blood) shown in the scan. Can't see much. Doc. said we will save the baby first. Jab and ate Duphaston. On MC for the rest of the week. My mum bday dinner. i was uncomfortable - period like cramps. my mum know nothin abt me pregnant. went back home, still bleeding. and slept.

14 july (thurs) - wake up to pee. 7am. I felt very empty. No pain either. open pants - wow. a piece of tissue with a black dot was found. show HB. tell me is all gone. I feel much better. I dun have discomfort. Nothing. nothing at all. empty. wrap it up and bin it. change pad and went back to sleep with a zillion thoughts in my mind. I was 6 Weeks and 5 Days. I am sure the embryo is gone maybe a week ago hence the MC now. So... maybe it was only 5weeks old??

sat - see my regular gynae. scan. nothing left. but still bleeding. No jab given, No need to eat Duphaston anymore. But I was given antibiotic (Zinnat) for 5days. is a white pill. eat this to avoid any infection. as a precaution.

Mon i went back to office and meet up with Gynae B for 2nd opinion. I want to focus to ensure it is all clear. She checked. no more bleeding. all ok and clear in side. no infection either. good. now wait for 4-6weeks for period to come back.

25 july (mon) i ate durian and drink chinese tea. my first caffeine break. tues i had bleeding - spotting. wednesday i had lunch and drank chinese tea again. the bleeding carried on. only pantiliner needed. so went back to see Gyane B. she said is hormonal. durian could be heaty to trigger it. chinese tea maybe not. but i think i know it was the chinese tea. She gave me Noflux to eat just to make sure all are shed out.

29 july (fri) i did a test. make a cup of japanese green tea. sure enough, after drinking a few mouth, my tummy area had a weird cramping feeling. i stop immediately and say. WELL, NO MORE ASIAN tea for me (At least not now).

as of now when I write this, the spotting/light bleeding has stop.

That's my long story. I am emotional. After reading from this forum I feel much better and also Gyane B I feel very much more confident and happy than my regular Gynae.

I will always remember the date I found out I was pregnant because it was HB 30th birthday. It was a gift which came and gone. I was a mother for that short period of time. :bye:

Chin up. Smile. Be positive. Stay healthy. Eat wisely. I am sure we will all have our child back with us. Time is the factor.

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Y3N, there is no point to keep asking the WHY cos no one will have the answer. only God knows. and we may only have the answer when we are at heaven's gate. when i just had miscarriage, i keep asking my HB if its my wrong doing that cause this and my HB hugs me tightly ask me not to do this to myself, cos if we really want to ask WHY, everyone around us would have to be blamed, including himself. the moment i find myself finally able to let go this is when one day i woke up and realized this is an unchanged fact, no matter wat, nothing can bring him back. its very sad, but life goes on and i need to continue living for myself and my family, so here i am. every healthy baby is a blessing and... i am praying we will all be blessed with healthy babiesss soon.

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... She advice no running because no sac can be seen yet. risky. If U want to run make sure u keep cool and hydrate yourself. She concluded no run again before i left her clinic.

I went ahead to run. I know. someone please shot me. Again, I dun know if it is because of the run or not.

...

25 july (mon) i ate durian and drink chinese tea. my first caffeine break. tues i had bleeding - spotting. wednesday i had lunch and drank chinese tea again. the bleeding carried on. only pantiliner needed. so went back to see Gyane B. she said is hormonal. durian could be heaty to trigger it. chinese tea maybe not. but i think i know it was the chinese tea. She gave me Noflux to eat just to make sure all are shed out.

29 july (fri) i did a test. make a cup of japanese green tea. sure enough, after drinking a few mouth, my tummy area had a weird cramping feeling. i stop immediately and say. WELL, NO MORE ASIAN tea for me (At least not now).

Y3N, what your gynae mentioned is all nonsense and has no scientific grounding.

Two of my friends who are gym buffs continued running and gym-ing throughout their pregnancy. I, myself, do heaps of brisk walking and such - in fact, was running for busses too - in my first and early 2nd trimester. Am still pregnant, the last I checked.

As for tea, I had oranges, tea, pineapple and mangosteen, etc in the first trimester of both my pregnancies. My hubby's SG friend who is big on pantang flipped but I just told him that my gynae said to eat whatever I want as long as it's in moderation. Btw, did you know that I had cravings for oranges and rambutans that I ate 1kg of rambutan every two days and drank orange juice three times a day?

When a miscarriage like yours (and mine) occurs, the cuplrit isn't what we did or ate (or didn't do or didn't eat) but genetic defect. If anything, your body did the right thing so don't ask why and don't blame anyone. Like Cheerio said, everything in life happens for a reason and sometimes we may not understand it.

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sad but holding on ...

my pregnancy was totally unexpected and so did the miscarriage....

22nd May - our wedding day.

June 9th bought 3 pregnancy homekit to test if i'm pregnant as i have a feeling i might be. Next day went to my normal GP to confirm there is a sac in place.

July 1st went to gynae the 1st time and saw baby and the heartbeat running ... we were both dumbfounded by this and baby was confirm to be only 7 weeks old.

July 25th went for 2nd checkup and found out that baby have stopped growing since 8th week old and no more heartbeat.

July 29th D&C done.

doc can only tell me that the reason was because baby was not healthy and nothing to do with us the parents. 15 - 20% pregnancy ends this way with baby losing heartbeat he says and there is nothing anyone could do as during the 1st trimester its all up to the baby and God on its formation.

i cried listening to the music that links me to the baby and i'm abit worried for the next pregnancy now. tears have sort of dried up abit now but my heart still hurts.

i'm planning to do an animal liberation for my lil ones. Whereever she/he is i hope she/he will be able to find a good parents since we are not fated to be with each another in this lifetime.

right now i'm going through a mini confinement at my MIL home and taking all the ginger food/soups. Hope to be able to gain back my health soon :) not thinking abt next baby yet just 1 step at a time right now ... 1 step ... then next ....

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sad but holding on ...

my pregnancy was totally unexpected and so did the miscarriage....

22nd May - our wedding day.

June 9th bought 3 pregnancy homekit to test if i'm pregnant as i have a feeling i might be. Next day went to my normal GP to confirm there is a sac in place.

July 1st went to gynae the 1st time and saw baby and the heartbeat running ... we were both dumbfounded by this and baby was confirm to be only 7 weeks old.

July 25th went for 2nd checkup and found out that baby have stopped growing since 8th week old and no more heartbeat.

July 29th D&C done.

doc can only tell me that the reason was because baby was not healthy and nothing to do with us the parents. 15 - 20% pregnancy ends this way with baby losing heartbeat he says and there is nothing anyone could do as during the 1st trimester its all up to the baby and God on its formation.

i cried listening to the music that links me to the baby and i'm abit worried for the next pregnancy now. tears have sort of dried up abit now but my heart still hurts.

i'm planning to do an animal liberation for my lil ones. Whereever she/he is i hope she/he will be able to find a good parents since we are not fated to be with each another in this lifetime.

right now i'm going through a mini confinement at my MIL home and taking all the ginger food/soups. Hope to be able to gain back my health soon :) not thinking abt next baby yet just 1 step at a time right now ... 1 step ... then next ....

Oh no!

Sorry to heard that, Skye! :ohmy:

*hugs* to you

Rest well and like you said...step by step

*hugs hugs hugs*

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kimmie18, cheerio,

thanks for the comforting words ...

resting but sometimes cant help but cry. Hope my baby is ok eventhough i've lost him/her.

sometimes feel so useless ... its in me but how come cant help baby to be more healthy and grow ?

funny thing is ... once i found out i was pregnant somehow or rather i was hesitant to tell even my best friends abt the pregnancy. I somehow was worried i will lose the baby via losing the heartbeat its a fear deep in me that i cant get it off. Instinct maybe ... or read too much until i get over worried.

Seeing my tummy getting bigger then found out baby is gone .. hurts.... hubby is hurting too over the loss ...

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It's alright to cry, but you must not blame yourself over your miscarriage. It is not your fault that you lost your baby. Like your doc said,the reason was because baby was not healthy and nothing to do with you.

Do support your hubs at this time as well. He might not show how much it hurts him, but the pain you are feeling is also what he's feeling right now.

Take care!

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skye, i always tot mommy will be the one who hurt the most in a miscarriage, but when i see my hubby crying like a child in the labour room, i couldnt help myself but keep on apologizing to him. i know its stupid, but what i wanted to say is this is normal reaction when we are face with this kinda 'tragedy' and his emotion has to be taken care too. take it slowly and cry as much as you want, eventually after tears has dry up you would have to stand up and go on with ur life again.

i did blame myself too for not able to carry on with the pregnancy, but for ur case its most likely due to genetic defect thats why heartbeat stop and baby stop growing too, so its best to let go... to be honest when i was carrying my 2nd baby, i had very bad pregnancy symptoms plus stressful work that sometimes i had the vision that i will lost the baby. like u said, perhaps its mother instinct. i am talking to my boy every now and then asking him to forgive me if its me who made him decided to leave and ask him to come back so that i have chance to love him all over again. sigh, its painful but we all learnt something thru this experience, things do happen for a reason.

take care and hope we will all be blessed with healthy baby soon.

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kimmie18, cheerio,

yea my hubby is more sensitive than me and well he was very happy with the pregnancy. he didnt read abt all these where baby heartbeat can just stop or baby stopped growing so he took it much harder because he didnt think it could/would happen at all. total shock to him when we didnt see the heartbeat anymore.

i always believe in fate and instinct. i trusted my instinct to know i was pregnant, i should have trusted my instinct when i feel something wasn't right anymore abt the pregnancy as well ... my boobs stop being so tender, not so lethargic anymore.... all of it shows i lost the baby prior to the scan but i thought i was heading to 12th weeks so these are lessening over a period of time. oh well too late to think about all that now.

starting nx week i have to drink the brands of essence and dom to built my blood flow again ... hope everything will be back to normal soon :) now we can continue with our honeymoon trip to melbourne and bali next march and june. still hope to have another dragon baby but i'm leaving it to the hands of God. when the time is right, i'm sure things will come together again. We'll be more prepare as a parent too come next round.

looking at my newly bought maternity and baby wear... cant help but felt sad but i believe as husband and wife, we will be stronger after this episode in time.

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Skye,

I had that same feeling too - that the little one won't make it. I don't know why. Maybe it can be too much reading or is an instinct. I told no one but my hubby. He was excited when can tell, but I said let's wait till we get a confirmation from doctor. That confirmation never came.

Anyhow, as mentioned many times is forum, don't blame yourself or anyone. Cry if you must. Is good to let it go all out.

Right now, focus on getting back on your health - to enjoy your honeymoon and to be strong enough to have the next little one.

HUGS.

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Y3N

thanks :) i guess sometimes mommy's instinct is very sharp and cant run away aye. Whatever will be, will be...

Before i go back to work, we are going to do a small ceremony in animal liberation on behalf for baby. We also promised to celebrate baby's EDD every year irregardless since he/she is our 1st baby thus will not be forgotten.

Cant wait to go for all the trips now and just enjoy the honeymoon.... kk in sept :D to celebrate my hubby's birthday. In the meantime, hubby have worked out a baby planning schedule for us LOL i dont know to laugh or feel stress because once after all the trips and i do get preggy ... he is sooooo gonna put me in a jail by making sure whatever i cant means a total no-no.

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hi cherrio,

it is sad to see what you had went through but i do experience the same as you. i lost my baby boy at 23 weeks pregnant (16th May 2011) due to the rupture of membrane (amnio fluid leak).there is no sign at all before this (no bleeding, no contraction) been did the test to know any infection and it found all normal. so till now doc just said sometime thing happen without any reason. SIGH.....why is me??

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hi cherrio,

it is sad to see what you had went through but i do experience the same as you. i lost my baby boy at 23 weeks pregnant (16th May 2011) due to the rupture of membrane (amnio fluid leak).there is no sign at all before this (no bleeding, no contraction) been did the test to know any infection and it found all normal. so till now doc just said sometime thing happen without any reason. SIGH.....why is me??

i must say my heart sinks when i see your message. it reminds me of what i have went through and i am sure it must be very very painful for u too. i still blame myself to be honest cos i feel the whole thing is preventable (but am not talking too much about it so that i don subconsiously feel it that way, otehrwise its difficult for me to continue going on with my life). he was a healthy baby, its just me unable to carry him to term. mine is not membrane rupture, i was told its likely due to implantation problem. did u went into premature labor too? well...i can imagine what you have went through and take good care of yourself, i know it is not easy. i am he hears mommy's prayer and come back to me once more.

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hi cherrio,

it is sad to see what you had went through but i do experience the same as you. i lost my baby boy at 23 weeks pregnant (16th May 2011) due to the rupture of membrane (amnio fluid leak).there is no sign at all before this (no bleeding, no contraction) been did the test to know any infection and it found all normal. so till now doc just said sometime thing happen without any reason. SIGH.....why is me??

i must say my heart sinks when i see your message. it reminds me of what i have went through and i am sure it must be very very painful for u too. i still blame myself to be honest cos i feel the whole thing is preventable (but am not talking too much about it so that i don subconsiously feel it that way, otehrwise its difficult for me to continue going on with my life). he was a healthy baby, its just me unable to carry him to term. mine is not membrane rupture, i was told its likely due to implantation problem. did u went into premature labor too? well...i can imagine what you have went through and take good care of yourself, i know it is not easy. i am he hears mommy's prayer and come back to me once more.

cherrio

I went through the premature labor. My heart just break like glass drop on floor. My baby was healthy all the while. That is why till now I still can't accept the fact but I force to accept it as nothing can bring back him to me. I know very well

how u went through everyday. I do blame myself for not able carry him if not now I shld in a big tummy n waiting my due next month. Sob sob

I'm now 2nd period and I have planning for conceive as I have the same thought like you.

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oh dear, any. i feel like crying now after reading ur post. i am dishearten for losing my bunny baby and i have his birth-date jotted down in my calendar, that is his birthday. i donno if i am going to celebrate it next year cos i still want to believe that he will come back to me. we must stay strong ok, i had a fren who lost her baby at week 36 or something, it was still birth, even more painful. she has her 2nd baby now. i hope we can get pregnant about the same time, i have also started trying..... hugsss.......

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Hugs cheerio

let's hope for the best. Ours baby will come back healthy soon. Can pm me your msn or hp?

any, my pm couldnt get through. i think it has been disabled. can u pm me yours instead?

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All,

I feel sorry for your loss and i can understand how it feels. I too had MC in Apr at 7 weeks+. I bled in one of the fine morning when about to leave for office and went to gynae immediately. Checked and confirmed baby has no more heart beat. Hubby and I were shocked and speechless in the clinic and doctor asked us if we were like to ask anything else. I remembered i asked a question what causes this happened. Gynae told me it's nothing got to do with me and it is the god's will for ending the abnormal pregnancy by itself. For few days i kept blaming myself for not being able to carry the baby well and had lost him/her. I cried and hubby consoled me and told me not to blame myself. I was grateful that he is being supportive. It was difficult for me to break the news to my family since it was my 1st pregnancy and i actually kept quiet for nearly a month before i broke the news to them and it was a heart breaking moment. I had 1 week rest at home and i did not went through any D&C. I chose the natural way by letting it discharge by itself however i went through the contraction pain too.

Gynae did told me to start trying after 3 cycles of period but i did not really follow that as both hubby and i are eager to have our family as we are already in our mid 30s. Soon after 1 cycle of period, i manage to get conceive *thank god* however am still worry that i may not be able to carry the baby well enough after the first MC experience. Everyday is a countdown to pass my first trimester and am still counting down now.

God bless everyone.

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cheerio, any,

you need to have more than 100 post count before can pm each another :) u can opt to exchange email addy here.

pingping79,

congrats for being pregnant again and thanks for sharing with us your story. Being my 1st pregnancy which i did not expect and so soon after our wedding ... its been a roller coaster ride for the past 2 months. There is still a hole in my heart but i feel alot better knowing that if the baby is not healthy its better for me to let go now than later. I've personally have friends whose kid was born with a hole in the heart and the lil girl suffer alot after birth with multiple surgery and ultimately passed away days before her 2nd birthday. She suffer, her parents suffer even more.

When the time is right, our fated baby will come :) I miss the feeling of being pregnant, the expectations, happiness and all that ... its a huge hole that we are trying to cover.

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Skye

thanks for your suggestion

you are right that if the baby is not healthy, it is a suffer for both parent and baby. anyhow is easy to say let go but in fact it is so hard. :sad:

always comfort myself to think for the best. soon will pregnant and deliver a healthy baby too :wink:

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