Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
purple lotus

Co-sleeping with baby/toddler

Recommended Posts

Hi all,

I would like to know how many of you co-sleep with your baby/toddler?

I have been co-sleeping with my kiddo since he was a newborn with my hubby. Initially I wanted to let him sleep alone in his cot but hubby find him so irresistably cute, he wants him to sleep beside him, between us.

I did not find it much of a problem till recently my kiddo developed this habit of climbing on top of me to sleep teddy bear style, hugging me like a koala bear. He also likes to play horse-riding on top of me. I'm now 7months pregnant.

I have explained to him many times that he is hurting his 'didi' but he still refuses to listen or maybe he doesn't understand. One time, I got so tired of him climbing over me that I pushed him away. He cried. Last night, he wanted to play horse-riding and then climbed up on me again. I got so tired cause I've been getting frequent lower backaches until sometimes I cannot move at night. I refused to sleep with him and he cried till he vomitted on himself, me, the bed and all over the floor. Me and hubby had to clean up the whole mess and that made me angrier at my son and I scolded him.

I dun wan my son to think that I dun love him anymore but at his age, I think he still does not understand why mummy is not the same anymore.

I have given up hope on trainning my elder son to sleep on his own for the time being. My second son due Dec, will have to sleep in his own cot. I dread to think of the time when he too learns to demand to sleep with me like his elder brother. When that time comes, maybe my hubby has to sacrifice and sleep somewhere. Well, it was his fault to begin with.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

my hubby too... now after reading your post i have to be firm of not letting him to do that.. hehe. so far baby is sleeping in his own cot, only sometimes after his 5am feeding i let him sleep with us till 8am and we prepare him to the nanny. my mom always tell me that we should train our baby to sleep at anywhere so that sometimes at any unavoidable situation we can put him to sleep. but say is easy la, i am always very weak in training the baby.

how about putting Ivan's cot next to your bed. so that he can see you and yet he is in his own cot.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Hi all,

I would like to know how many of you co-sleep with your baby/toddler?

I have been co-sleeping with my kiddo since he was a newborn with my hubby. Initially I wanted to let him sleep alone in his cot but hubby find him so irresistably cute, he wants him to sleep beside him, between us.

I did not find it much of a problem till recently my kiddo developed this habit of climbing on top of me to sleep teddy bear style, hugging me like a koala bear. He also likes to play horse-riding on top of me. I'm now 7months pregnant.

I have explained to him many times that he is hurting his 'didi' but he still refuses to listen or maybe he doesn't understand. One time, I got so tired of him climbing over me that I pushed him away. He cried. Last night, he wanted to play horse-riding and then climbed up on me again. I got so tired cause I've been getting frequent lower backaches until sometimes I cannot move at night. I refused to sleep with him and he cried till he vomitted on himself, me, the bed and all over the floor. Me and hubby had to clean up the whole mess and that made me angrier at my son and I scolded him.

I dun wan my son to think that I dun love him anymore but at his age, I think he still does not understand why mummy is not the same anymore.

I have given up hope on trainning my elder son to sleep on his own for the time being. My second son due Dec, will have to sleep in his own cot. I dread to think of the time when he too learns to demand to sleep with me like his elder brother. When that time comes, maybe my hubby has to sacrifice and sleep somewhere. Well, it was his fault to begin with.

Hi all,

I would like to know how many of you co-sleep with your baby/toddler?

I have been co-sleeping with my kiddo since he was a newborn with my hubby. Initially I wanted to let him sleep alone in his cot but hubby find him so irresistably cute, he wants him to sleep beside him, between us.

I did not find it much of a problem till recently my kiddo developed this habit of climbing on top of me to sleep teddy bear style, hugging me like a koala bear. He also likes to play horse-riding on top of me. I'm now 7months pregnant.

I have explained to him many times that he is hurting his 'didi' but he still refuses to listen or maybe he doesn't understand. One time, I got so tired of him climbing over me that I pushed him away. He cried. Last night, he wanted to play horse-riding and then climbed up on me again. I got so tired cause I've been getting frequent lower backaches until sometimes I cannot move at night. I refused to sleep with him and he cried till he vomitted on himself, me, the bed and all over the floor. Me and hubby had to clean up the whole mess and that made me angrier at my son and I scolded him.

I dun wan my son to think that I dun love him anymore but at his age, I think he still does not understand why mummy is not the same anymore.

I have given up hope on trainning my elder son to sleep on his own for the time being. My second son due Dec, will have to sleep in his own cot. I dread to think of the time when he too learns to demand to sleep with me like his elder brother. When that time comes, maybe my hubby has to sacrifice and sleep somewhere. Well, it was his fault to begin with.

my kid was more into climbing onto his dad for hugging to sleep.. with me he will cuddle beside me... but there were instances when my boy used to sit on my tummy and jump as if i am some jumperoo for him... difficult to tell him off or scold... i would instead put him down and ask him to sayang my tummy by leaning his face on it.. and then if he still wants to jump on him, i let him sit on my lower abdomen, like just above the thighs and jump all he wants

i used to be so stressed abt handling him during my pregnancy, but u know, it just came and we handled it.. most importantly dont get angry or hit him for that, cos it will make him feel even more 'less wanted' especially with the baby comng (i know it is easy to say, even i lost my temper a few times, but the key is always to try to get angry less)

when at home with my kid, after 7mth onwards i stopped carrying him up the stairs.. we held hands and he would walk instead and we will count the steps together... but of course i did carry him at other time.. i think after 8th month only i stopped carrying him cos i was resting at my mom's hse

now with the NB's presence, i let my son play near me while i BF.. and he like to sayang, kiss, and 'carry' baby.. i dont stop him. but he is in his terrible two, so when his mood is not right, he tends to hit the NB... sometimes NB will cry, sometimes he tak kisah.. hehe.. i dont scold my kid for it.. i tell him 'baby pain' and talk to him about it

another thing... we co-sleep with NB & kid in the same room, we have queen bed and single bed put together... earlier used to worry if NB's crying at nite will disturb my kid.. but so far (did this for 3 nites) seems all ok.. *touchwood*

dealing with a kid + baby is not easy, but not impossible either.. so hang in there.. i know i was spreading my worries and problems on this forum too... and learning to deal with it after sharing and getting advice from mamas here.. i might come back later for more support ;)

and hey.. me too if hubby complain too much, i always scold him back on 'his fault' lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

it's nice to be able to blame hb but in my case i cant cos it's my choice. i suggested co sleeping...so it's always my fault.

when i was pregannt, my girl also wanted to sleep bear style, on top of me. it was such a hard time for me..so i hugged her side ways or her head on my chest without touchinng tummy.

after delivery, i was in pain so it was even harder n with baby around, it was a terrible time. slowly,i managed to convince her to sleep by my side with me patting her to sleep. so now i breastfeed baby n pat the older on to sleep. both hands occupied. it's tiring but better controlled.

sometimes, she will make noise n wake baby up. but after a while baby got used to her sister's voice n older sister got used to baby crying at night when she wants to feed or changed. i thank God. it is not easy, co sleeping..my hb also gets kicked by older girl n he has to endure the baby crying but my worries somehow worked itself out. i guess when we have no choice, we'll have to find a way to adapt. i still dont regret co sleeping. soon we can all cuddle up together!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

abt the blame, i was referring to getting me pregnant! :P

i used to worry my NB will disturb my toddler's sleep.. it is instead the other way round.. for some reason sanju has been waking up at night crying, and needs his daddy to console him... while the NB getting irritated LOL

i enjoy co-sleeping on the whole :)

it's nice to be able to blame hb but in my case i cant cos it's my choice. i suggested co sleeping...so it's always my fault.

when i was pregannt, my girl also wanted to sleep bear style, on top of me. it was such a hard time for me..so i hugged her side ways or her head on my chest without touchinng tummy.

after delivery, i was in pain so it was even harder n with baby around, it was a terrible time. slowly,i managed to convince her to sleep by my side with me patting her to sleep. so now i breastfeed baby n pat the older on to sleep. both hands occupied. it's tiring but better controlled.

sometimes, she will make noise n wake baby up. but after a while baby got used to her sister's voice n older sister got used to baby crying at night when she wants to feed or changed. i thank God. it is not easy, co sleeping..my hb also gets kicked by older girl n he has to endure the baby crying but my worries somehow worked itself out. i guess when we have no choice, we'll have to find a way to adapt. i still dont regret co sleeping. soon we can all cuddle up together!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"abt the blame, i was referring to getting me pregnant! :P"

that's so funy!! never thought of that..hey, he's responsible too okay...? lol

yup, my older one also wakes up at night. mengigau..screaming or crying for me.. i believe she's insecured after baby's arrival.. poor girl..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm so tired. Previously my 1 year old has been sleeping in his cot in the same bedroom as us and has had no issues.

This whole week, he wakes up in the middle of the night and insists on sleeping next to me.

He screams & cries if my husband tries to rock him back to sleep and will only keep quiet when I carry him and let him sleep next to me. We don't really want him to get used to sleeping in between us :unsure:

Any ideas?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

sanju is quite different.. after baby came home (i was at my mom's place then) he was ok sleeping thru the night..during that period he was seeing my hubby once in 2 weeks or so.. cos of this whenever hubby is down visiting us, he behaved like super-glue with hubby... dont want to eat/bathe/play.. and now we are at MIL place... ever since we got here sanju has been waking up crying at night, looking for his dad... but now he sees myhubby daily.. so i am hoping his situation improves soon

"abt the blame, i was referring to getting me pregnant! :P"

that's so funy!! never thought of that..hey, he's responsible too okay...? lol

yup, my older one also wakes up at night. mengigau..screaming or crying for me.. i believe she's insecured after baby's arrival.. poor girl..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm quite worried that Ivan will be disturbed by his younger brother's crying as well. But there is no way NB is going to sleep in the same bed cos I'm afraid Ivan will squash his little brother. Ivan has a habit of rolling over when he sleeps. We had to be very careful cos he has rolled off the bed when he was sleeping. Since there is no place for us to arrage the king size bed close to the wall, he sleeps between me and hubby. Will setup a cot for No.2 to sleep in the same room. Hope to train both of them to sleep in their own room when they reach 3-4years.

By the way, Q, I think I still didn't get Sanju's bro's name. :smile:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

No, mine was born in the yr of tiger and I pumped exclusively for him after the 2nd month.

I actually managed to trick him into not hugging me bear style, by playing a game with him hugging our big bolster bear style. When he got tired, he didn't climb onto me and hug me bear style anymore.

But last night, he suddenly cried, I think he was having nightmares and climbed onto me bear style and wanted me to pat him back to sleep. I could feel the lil one inside the tummy kicking him. *Sigh*

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
all this bear-style kids, were they born in the year of the cow???

and were they breastfed via direct latching?

Year of the tiger.

And yes, direct latching :lol:

That night hubby was so frustrated cos baby was screaming non stop at some stupid o clock in the middle of the night as he wanted to sleep with me, he grumpily put baby from his cot in between us & mumbled "see, all breastfed kids are like that"

It must be some kind of phase. Cos I think baby is closer to hubby during the day as he spends most of his time with baby and he's very hands on (I'm the one glued to pc, doing my own stuff) but for the past few weeks, baby has been demanding to sleep next to me at night. He'd cry & keep pointing to me. It's def not because he's hungry as sometimes I don't breastfeed him at night, he'd just come close to me, hug me then fall asleep.

I know people will say enjoy it while it lasts, there'll come a time when your kid doesn't want to sleep next to you anymore ... but I don't want it to be a habbit. What should I do? Help!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Mine also the same, born in tiger year, direct latching from 0-9 mths and after that exclusive pumping since he doesn't want to latch on anymore.

When it is his bedtime, I have to hug him and sleep next to him. When he fall asleep, then only quietly carry him to his cot. In the middle of the night, he will wake up on and off looking for his pacifier. But I noticed when he reached around 12.5 mths and he woke up at night crying, giving him the pacifier doesn't work anymore. He wants to sleep on the bed together wif me and hubby.

Not too sure whether it has anything to do with the 2nd baby I am currently carrying? Hhhmmm....

My son has been very attached and clingy to me all the while. When I was not in the bedroom (but my husband is in the bedroom), my son will cry non-stop eventhough my husband tried to pacify him. When the crying doesn't stop, he will carry him down just to hv a glimpse of me (I was pumping milk downstairs). Then only my son will stop crying. When I am at home, he doesn't want anyone to carry him except me (exception to whoever said 'kai kai' (jalan-jalan) to him. I guess he's not that innocent after all!) Ppl said breastmilk-fed baby very clingy to mother. My husband can testify that :lol:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

he is shanjeev :) the short version oso comes to sanju, so i am wondering how to find a nickname for him

I'm quite worried that Ivan will be disturbed by his younger brother's crying as well. But there is no way NB is going to sleep in the same bed cos I'm afraid Ivan will squash his little brother. Ivan has a habit of rolling over when he sleeps. We had to be very careful cos he has rolled off the bed when he was sleeping. Since there is no place for us to arrage the king size bed close to the wall, he sleeps between me and hubby. Will setup a cot for No.2 to sleep in the same room. Hope to train both of them to sleep in their own room when they reach 3-4years.

By the way, Q, I think I still didn't get Sanju's bro's name. :smile:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe you guys can try getting your older ones a proper bed and setting it up, etc in front of them to get them all excited about it?

We did this with Eva because we felt that a crib wouldn't last long and she's of the right age. So we went to IKEA and bought a kiddie bed, a comforter, and linen set (very cute design - has ladybugs, carrots, strawberries, etc over it). We set it up while she was awake so throughout the whole thing, she was like "Bed bed bed". The moment it was done and I lay in the bedsheet (she kept pointing out the various items on the quilt cover and bedsheet), she quickly climbed into it for her afternoon nap. Since then, she has been sleeping in a bed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

AngelT,

Mine is also super clingy. I sometimes refer to him as my little koala. There was one time, I woke up to pee in the middle of the night and when he couldn't find me, he cried and doesn't want my hubby to pacify him. He cried till he vomitted. His dad's way of pacifying him is by letting him play with the laptop or the phone.

Q,

Nice name. I'm still thinking of No.2's name.

Mabel,

Good idea. Maybe can start Ivan by letting him take his afternoon nap on his own bed 1st. When he is more comfortable taking naps on his own, then only let him sleep on his own at night.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We trained Violet to sleep on her cot starting from 5th mth onward till now and she is going to 14 mths old. Just once a while she will wake up in the mid of the nite, call us and want to sleep with us.

During the mth of 5th to 10th I don't nid to accompany her before she sleeps, I just need to feed her, put her back to her cot, kiss good nite then I can walk out from the room but after 10th mth she will refuse me to leave the room and wants me to accompany her, talk to her, sing for her and only then she will go to sleep. So normally after she settled down like 30 minutes later, we will transfer her to her own cot.

We are yet to let her sleeps alone in another bedroom, her daddy still don't have the 'heart' to do so, so she is in her cot but near to our bed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...