mandylow25 0 Report post Posted August 3, 2007 It was reported recently that more malaysian married women are willing to have extra marital affairs. The findings are shocking. I read this article: http://themalaysianlife.blogspot.com/2007/...k-for-love.html Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FarFarAway 0 Report post Posted August 3, 2007 Hmmm I am not surprised actually. I don't think cheating is good for anyone but after reading a lot of this forum's topics, I can also see that Malaysian wives have to live with a lot of crap due to our culture's many discriminative aspects. So in the end, some thing has to give. I doubt, really, if these women actually become happier from the cheating. We're not wired like men. So cheating to get even is not really a solution. It's better to add value on ourselves as women and make more choices available to us to have a balanced life. If the HB is not the focal point in a woman's life, maybe he'll think more because he has more to lose. When e doesn't cheat...I think most of us would not even think about doing it... Afterall, cheating is a sign of an already failing marriage. Usually, the 3rd party acts as a kind of comfort zone and escape. Have you girls heard about little dragon ladies? I was appalled when last CNY I went home and one day, my mum's cousins came to visit us. The cousin brother brought his mistress from China along with their newborn. And the wife and the older kids tagged along too. The chinese woman was really being very mean to everyone especially the maid. The wife was very sad and took it all in. She doesn't have anything since she's the traditional chinese wife in her 50s. Although this is not typical case, the fact that men cheat is more usual. We should not think it is more acceptable. Why are we so shocked at the fact that women cheat? There are logical reasons and it's a survival tactiq. If women 40 years ago had the same freedom, they may have done it already. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
meiteoh 0 Report post Posted August 4, 2007 I think the question we should all ask is WHY do women *need* to cheat in the first place? What is so wrong with your partner - the man you fell in love with and swore your fidelity to - that you have to turn to someone else for emotional and pyshical gratification? What is so wrong with your marriage that you would take pleasure in something that is morally/culturally wrong for both you, your partner and your loved ones? I find that most of the time, people - not just men OR women - who cheat lack communication with their partners and understanding of what marriage is really all about. And this holds true for the person who cheats and his/her partner. Look at it this way, a person will not cheat unless there is something wrong somewhere. It takes two people to cause a marriage to breakdown, not just one. The results are not shocking...they have just been made public, that's all. :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
candychong 0 Report post Posted August 23, 2007 你会背叛你男友或丈夫吗? ;) 会不会与前度男友做比较? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joeyjoe 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2007 Let me help to translate Candy's question :- Will you cheat on your boyfriend or husband? Will you compare him to your ex-boyfriend? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mandylow25 0 Report post Posted September 12, 2007 Hmmm I am not surprised actually. I don't think cheating is good for anyone but after reading a lot of this forum's topics, I can also see that Malaysian wives have to live with a lot of crap due to our culture's many discriminative aspects. So in the end, some thing has to give. I doubt, really, if these women actually become happier from the cheating. We're not wired like men. So cheating to get even is not really a solution. It's better to add value on ourselves as women and make more choices available to us to have a balanced life. If the HB is not the focal point in a woman's life, maybe he'll think more because he has more to lose. When e doesn't cheat...I think most of us would not even think about doing it... Afterall, cheating is a sign of an already failing marriage. Usually, the 3rd party acts as a kind of comfort zone and escape. Have you girls heard about little dragon ladies? I was appalled when last CNY I went home and one day, my mum's cousins came to visit us. The cousin brother brought his mistress from China along with their newborn. And the wife and the older kids tagged along too. The chinese woman was really being very mean to everyone especially the maid. The wife was very sad and took it all in. She doesn't have anything since she's the traditional chinese wife in her 50s. Although this is not typical case, the fact that men cheat is more usual. We should not think it is more acceptable. Why are we so shocked at the fact that women cheat? There are logical reasons and it's a survival tactiq. If women 40 years ago had the same freedom, they may have done it already. I think in Asian culture it is acceptabel for the males to have 2nd wifes (mistresses). This has been an ongoing practice for ages. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Escudo 0 Report post Posted September 12, 2007 I think in Asian culture it is acceptabel for the males to have 2nd wifes (mistresses). This has been an ongoing practice for ages. Acceptable?? If really acceptable we will be addressing mistress same level with wife liao loooh.... Nowadays, mistress is not acceptable nor recognize in law. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChloeSevigny 0 Report post Posted October 19, 2007 if my husband brought his mistress and kid back from china he would get a lawsuit filed, i'd own almost all his ass, and he can hide in a hole from the shame. i think it's really stupid to bring the other women, their love child, and have her boss family around during cny. mine would have kicked them out for sure. in the west when women are brought up, they are taught to be very empowered. they don't take nonsense from their men. i had an ex from years ago, i call him cinapek (behind his back of course). he was a lazy sob, who'd sit at home the whole day while i worked and brought home the dosh. i would of course nag him about this fact, and what a lazy bum he is. his response was, "the sooner you realise there's no such thing as equality, the happier you will be". what a blinking moron. look at how women get whistled at and harassed just walking down the road. i honestly don't feel safe in kl. you even hear stories of women getting raped, and when they go to the police, they say it's because you wore something sexy, you tempted the man. it even comes out in the press sometimes, ignorant politikus will pass off stupid comments like this. rapist psychologically go for the most boring looking woman in the room because no one's watching her. if you wear something really outrageous, no one will rape you because the rapist knows or at least notices that all eyes are on the sexy chick. but you hear of these stupid comments anyway. why women are having affairs? well men think women are stupid. they have affairs, behave like kids, emotionally and mentally neglect or abuse their partners.... and in our position today, being better educated and more able, who would put up with that bs? it's rather interesting because most comments here are quite sympathetic towards women having affairs. frankly i am as well. it's not an easy thing to confront yourself in the mirror and acknowledge what you're doing. but you must be pretty unhappy to even resort to it in the first place. happy people who are in love don't stray. `C Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jeffyai 0 Report post Posted April 3, 2008 you even hear stories of women getting raped, and when they go to the police, they say it's because you wore something sexy, you tempted the man. it even comes out in the press sometimes, ignorant politikus will pass off stupid comments like this.rapist psychologically go for the most boring looking woman in the room because no one's watching her. if you wear something really outrageous, no one will rape you because the rapist knows or at least notices that all eyes are on the sexy chick.rapist psychologically go for the most boring looking woman in the room because no one's watching her? how do you know that?? where you heard it from?? any scientific fact??if you wear sexy , guy will look at you like rapist... period.. sexy dress cause eraction on guy penis..that is science..don't believe me?? try to dress night gown in family dinner.. you will get some negatif respond...when there is a tudung... it must be a reason to prevent rapist to have a look and get lust.. if you want safe.. dress appropriately.. you learn that since primary school right??non-muslim are given more freedom in fashion.. but that doesn't mean you should exploit it.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
titi2008 0 Report post Posted April 3, 2008 .. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RainbowChaiHong 0 Report post Posted April 3, 2008 I find that most of the time, people - not just men OR women - who cheat lack communication with their partners and understanding of what marriage is really all about. And this holds true for the person who cheats and his/her partner. Look at it this way, a person will not cheat unless there is something wrong somewhere. It takes two people to cause a marriage to breakdown, not just one.Adding on to 'lack of communication', i think another reason why we cheat is bcoz of insecurity feeling. Actually, it is really sad to learn that your spouse cheated you. I, myself cannot take it. If I found out that my partner cheated me, I will just leave. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gentlelove 0 Report post Posted April 4, 2008 I am not surprise as I know one who does it. There are many factors but for Malaysian women who cheats on their husbands, I believe the problem started with their husbands and not with the women. If there is love, warmth and understanding in the household, I believe most of the Malaysian women, being conservative, would prefer to stay home.Men cheat to look for sex, women cheat to look for love, agree? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gentlelove 0 Report post Posted April 4, 2008 I read somewhere that some rapist will be attracted to 'tudung' girls too. Normal people won't know the rapist mind. Like Ted Bundy.. he is psycho rite? Besides, tudung is like long hair, easy to grab rite? So it's easy target. So, I don't agree that tudung can save a girl frm being raped.Sad to say, most of the rapist come from 1 race. They might be attracted to their own race or the tudung might symbolise a form of chasity, which to them, means extra stimulating when they reap through that symbol of chasity.It is time to legalise prostituition and sex toy shops in Malaysia. Even these are allowed in Singapore Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
simoncwk 0 Report post Posted April 5, 2008 Malaysia wont legalise prostitution and sex toy shops, that is 100% for sure, because Malaysia is islamic country. If want to legalise prositution then i think opposite party have win the BN and forming a new government. I believe even malay people also agreed with prositution but they just 'acting' like holy people but they are just a holy bas****. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
daddyo 0 Report post Posted April 5, 2008 Infidelity, whether it is committed by the man or the woman in a marriage is still wrong. Question is why do you want to do something that you know is wrong?I find it funny that the women reportedly had affairs because they know that their husbands are also having affairs. Does that make it right? Is that how it works? An eye for an eye? What does it prove? That you are just as capable? Or that you're sexually empowered? Equality of the sexes?I guess it boils down to the individual. To me this whole 'I'm doing it because you are' situation reeks of immaturity from both partners. It's just like two kids fighting. You kick sand on my shoes, I return the favor. In the end both wind up with dirty shoes and no one wins. What's the point? After the flirty husband finds out about the affair, then what? Carry on like there's nothing wrong? Divorce?Even if the couple ends uphaving a divorce, their reputation is tarnished. Imagine if they find a future prospective partner... what are they gonna tell them? That they divorced because both are having affairs? I don't think their future prospective partners will like the sound of that. It will bring up the question that if you can cheat on your ex, what makes you so sure that you won't cheat on me?For me, the right thing to do when one finds out that their partner is having an affair is to confront it and find a solution. If the relationship can be saved, then work to mend it. If divorce is the only solution then so be it. I will not stoop down to their level and retaliate by having an affair of my own. Two wrongs does not make a right. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zelda 0 Report post Posted April 5, 2008 Malaysia wont legalise prostitution and sex toy shops, that is 100% for sure, because Malaysia is islamic country. If want to legalise prositution then i think opposite party have win the BN and forming a new government. I believe even malay people also agreed with prositution but they just 'acting' like holy people but they are just a holy bas****.Legalising prostitution is a debate not only in our country but also in many other countries. It is a very complex issues with many pros and cons. I think people should be able to voice their opinion. But it needs to be constructive manner. Such remark is not only insulting but bordering racism and discriminatory. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fatality 0 Report post Posted October 26, 2008 Not suprised. I had a friend who loves to f**K around. Its not because of love....its because of sex drive. And she admitted it to me...wow...Be it sleeping with a married man, best friend (guy).... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pivot 0 Report post Posted May 6, 2009 i had a gal friend who had this kinda thinking... she sleeps with men from time to time. married ones, foreign guys, etc etc.... her sex drive is really high... scary... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
askray 0 Report post Posted May 6, 2009 i had a gal friend who had this kinda thinking... she sleeps with men from time to time. married ones, foreign guys, etc etc.... her sex drive is really high... scary...I ask my maid on her comment ,she said this kind of girl is really gatal ...or we can said...like pivot girl firend Higher Sex demand.. :wacko3: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gal289 0 Report post Posted May 7, 2009 i had a gal friend who had this kinda thinking... she sleeps with men from time to time. married ones, foreign guys, etc etc.... her sex drive is really high... scary...I ask my maid on her comment ,she said this kind of girl is really gatal ...or we can said...like pivot girl firend Higher Sex demand.. :wacko3: Erm... isn't this topic a bit intimate to be consulting your maid on? LOL Just my opinion... no offense intended. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
askray 0 Report post Posted May 7, 2009 i had a gal friend who had this kinda thinking... she sleeps with men from time to time. married ones, foreign guys, etc etc.... her sex drive is really high... scary...I ask my maid on her comment ,she said this kind of girl is really gatal ...or we can said...like pivot girl firend Higher Sex demand.. :wacko3: Erm... isn't this topic a bit intimate to be consulting your maid on? LOL Just my opinion... no offense intended.because last time we have a discussion about a maid of my collegue which just join for 1 mth already ask my friend to give permission to marry with his bf in malaysia...so my friend quickly sent her back. - My maid said they are just too gatal lah should come and focus on work but not think of marry (sex+romance+love).. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
corrinne 0 Report post Posted May 8, 2009 I don't agreed having high sex drive is a reasons for women starts cheating outside as her "needs" can't be fulfilled loh....there are many ways to satisfied a "needs" like oral, masturbate, fake dildo, vibrator, and etc... Most cases that I come across is that they are having family problems and love are no longer there, then the cheating issue will arise. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BeCool 0 Report post Posted May 14, 2009 there are things we can share, and there are certain that we cant... especially the one sleeping beside us every night. if i were to make her seek happiness from other guy, definitely i've failed to be her good man Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sLeePyWannaBe 0 Report post Posted May 15, 2009 I don't agreed having high sex drive is a reasons for women starts cheating outside as her "needs" can't be fulfilled loh....there are many ways to satisfied a "needs" like oral, masturbate, fake dildo, vibrator, and etc... Most cases that I come across is that they are having family problems and love are no longer there, then the cheating issue will arise.corrine, from what i know, it happens to some women... i know one where she told me when she got affair last time, its becos of her sex drive...she needs more to fulfill her needs. i can understand that cos me also the same...once i need sex, i keep wanting it...so do girls...but thank God that she stop all this thingy cos she felt very dirty and regret...she told me that if her bf can fulfill her enough, then she wont think of those thing again...so, i think a girl having high sex drive for a reason is reasonable...maybe u dunno about the urge of having sex...or maybe u dont and i know you are loyal type person...CHEERS Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
beautifulgown 0 Report post Posted May 15, 2009 Some are just want the romance, wanna to be in love again or to be loved and pampered again, which they can't get from their husband.Some are just want the thrill but once she got in, she may become addicted and do it over and over, change 1 to another to enjoy the romance and thrill. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites